New Moon Fears
by SesshomaruFreak
Summary: YAOI (boyxboy) ON TEMPORARY HIATUS (I'm exhausted and working on 'D,D', but I promise I will not just abandon this fic) The one night Inuyasha shouldn't go out alone, of course he does! When he gets into trouble, the one person he didn't ever want to see on this night is the one to save him. SessxInu
1. The Moonless Night

DISCLAIMER: I do NOT own any rights to 'Inuyasha' or associated characters! That honor belongs to Rumiko Takahashi!  
(If I DID own it, it would have been a LOT different...)

This is a yaoi (boyxboy). If this is still not clear: This story is gonna have two guys, who are brothers, getting it on!  
  
SessxInu mainly.

Hello, my lovely readers! 'The Right Choice' was a huge success, so thank you! This is my second fic to post, and I hope you all enjoy it and show it as much love as you did the first! Mainly SessxInu, but that could change later...

 **Sorry to everyone who was enjoying this! It got taken down because M is not a high enough rating, apparently. I am reposting with caution. Let me be clear: NOT FOR KIDS! Everyone else, enjoy.**

No real warnings this chapter...some blood-tasting. Oh, this story has 'established feelings'-they already like each other, but don't realize how they feel, but both are too f***ing stubborn to say anything, and this story changes that.

Language, and because of future content, should be rated MA

 **"New Moon Fears"**

Summary: The one night Inuyasha should never go out alone, of course he _does_! When he is in trouble, the last person he ever wanted to see on this night is the one to save him.

"Chapter 1: The Moonless Night"

Inuyasha was running out of time.

He'd been accosted by a reptile demon while out alone,and the disgusting creature couldn't have come at a worse time. The sun was creeping towards the horizon, shadows lengthening as red-gold sunset light poured over the clearing.

Inuyasha knew he shouldn't have come out alone, had known before even doing so. But he hated the way his pack tried to coddle him on this night. Fuck, he'd _rather_ be buried under their protective attention right now! They were not here to protect him...nobody was.

He glared at his attacker. The vile reptile grinned back, not even knowing what was about to happen, what night this was.  
The evil, hissing voice taunted him. "Little half-breed, all this fighting is wearing you down. Drop your sword, and I might take pity on you. You will be mine either way, so why make it harder on yourself?"

Inuyasha snarled. Nobody called him a _half-breed_! Only one person could get away with doing so...

He snarled again. "You sick bastard! I will never be yours! _Wind Scar_!"

Tetsusaiga released the fiery attack, but Inuyasha was alarmed when he realized it didn't have near the force it normally did. Then he felt it.

His power was draining. The last sliver of the sun was about to vanish, the darkened moon taking its place in the sky.  
"No, please. Not yet." he whispered as he struggled to lift the Fang, which had suddenly become so heavy.

" _ **WIND SCAR!**_ " he yelled with every bit of breath in his body.

Inuyasha felt his heart drop when only a few weak bolts of power flew out of his blade, not even fazing his enemy.

The scaly demon advanced with a gleam in his eye. "This is going to be fun, little half-breed." the creature chuckled darkly. "Fun for me, anyway."

Inuyasha dropped Tetsusaiga as the blade reverted to its sealed form, and he raised his claws. Damn, he was wore out! The lizard-like assailant had gotten several good hits on him as he'd weakened. The hanyou's fire-rat outfit was torn in multiple places, and he was covered in scratches and bruises. He had lost a lot of blood, and he was not sure how much more he could stand to lose. Any other evening, he knew this scaly bastard would be dead by now.

Inuyasha hissed as his vision dimmed and his blood and bones _pulsed_.

"Iron Reaver..." His clawed hand dropped back to his side as he staggered backwards into a tree. No...he didn't want to die like this, too fucking weak to stop this asshole! The green demon came closer and hissed at him, but Inuyasha could no longer understand.

It was too late.

Suddenly, a flash of swirling silver filled his vision.

"The half-breed belongs to me, vermin."

 _Oh, gods! That voice! No...anybody but him! Not tonight!_

Inuyasha heard the unmistakeable snap of a neck getting broken, and suddenly, a pair of narrowed golden eyes were in front of him. "Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha tried to pull away, heart pounding in fear. "No...please leave me alone." he whimpered as he felt his claws and fangs retracting into his body. "Not...you...not...tonight." he breathed as his sight dimmed even further.

A look of confusion in those amber eyes was the last thing Inuyasha saw before falling unconscious.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sesshomaru was confused, and becoming a bit concerned. This was strange.

He had caught the scent of Inuyasha's blood and come to see what trouble the little half-breed had gotten himself into _this_ time. He had arrived just in time to see Tetsusaiga revert, and Inuyasha looking wounded, but as defiant as always. The reptilian demon had not been that strong; Inuyasha should have had no problem.

Sesshomaru had noticed several things, though, none of which he liked.

One, the reptile had carried the scent of arousal.

Two, Inuyasha's scent was off in a way the Lord of the West could not pinpoint.

Three, Inuyasha was acting much worse than his injuries indicated.

Four, Inuyasha's scent had not held fear...until Sesshomaru had made his presence known.

He decided he liked that last fact the least; it gave him an odd feeling in his stomach. Now, the little half-breed had apparently passed out after saying some strange things. Slowly, Sesshomaru reached one hand out towards Inuyasha's hair and blinked.

Unless he was losing his mind, the storm-silver hair was rippling into a deep, shiny black. Velvety pink-and-white ears slipped away, and Sesshomaru stared as the curve of a human ear peeked out from the silky black hair. A quick glance confirmed: no claws.

The demon realized tonight was a new moon. Before he could stop himself, he was hissing at the passed-out hanyou.

"Dammit, Inuyasha! Foolish pup, you should not have been out and alone on your human night! Stubborn half-breed!"

Deciding that the younger male was absolutely _not_ going to further disgrace their family by staying out here and getting picked up by gods-know-what, and definitely not by dying as a human, (and deciding that this was exactly what he needed to tell himself) Sesshomaru sighed and lifted his brother into his arms.

Then he felt the hanyou shifting, and heard a soft mumbling. "I'm sorry, Sesshomaru. Please don't be mad."

Sesshomaru stared down at his little brother in surprise. Inuyasha was out cold, apparently talking in his sleep. On impulse, Sesshomaru leaned his head down to murmur into a curved ear. "Why would I be mad?"

A soft whimper escaped the black-haired human in his arms. "You're always mad at me. Everything I do makes you mad." Even as the humanized pup said this, Sesshomaru felt him trying to shift closer to his chest.

He frowned at the unconscious human. Inuyasha's words had given him that odd sensation again, the one he'd felt when he realized Inuyasha's scent hadn't held fear before he'd shown up. And the feel of the smaller male trying to tuck closer to him made that feeling even worse.

Trying to distract himself, he glanced down and saw Tetsusaiga. He hesitated, then sighed.

Damn. He certainly couldn't just _leave_ the stupid thing here! He held no attachment to the Fang since getting Baksaiga, but still.

This sword protected his little brother, and it did not deserve to be left behind.

With yet another sigh, he shifted Inuyasha to one arm and kneeled next to the sword. He hesitated for a moment; he didn't want to get burned again. "Tetsusaiga, I am not trying to steal you. I am trying to get you back to Inuyasha."

He reached out to lay his hand lightly on Tetsusaiga's hilt. He felt a slight pulse of power as the sword hesitated. His hand tingled, but the Fang did not burn him. Another pulse of power, and this one felt urgent.

"It is ok. He's right here." Sesshomaru murmured as he picked up the sword and sheathed it in the scabbard at Inuyasha's waist. Even asleep, Inuyasha's hand drifted to his sword's hilt. At the same time, Sesshomaru felt an almost excited pulse from Tensaiga, telling him that Tetsusaiga was happy to be with its master once more, even if said master was human at the moment.

Sesshomaru took a deep breath. This was all he needed: an unconscious, human Inuyasha, and two swords that _still_ seemed eager to communicate and respond to each other.

Ridiculous.

Sesshomaru began walking, passing the body of the filthy reptile that had intended to violate his little brother, and he found himself growling softly. "I told you the half-breed was mine."

Before long, he found a small cave and made his way inside. He kneeled down and carefully moved Inuyasha out of his arms until the younger male was leaning against the wall.

Then his nose twitched; Inuyasha's blood was everywhere, and from the smell of it, it was still flowing. Sesshomaru considered his options - there weren't many - then reached out to carefully remove the transformed hanyou's fire-rat haori and white undershirt.

Most of the cuts and scratches on his little brother's body were shallow, but one deep cut that ran between the muscular chest and toned stomach still bled. Sesshomaru glanced up at Inuyasha's face. The hanyou-turned-human was still unconscious, but looked like he was in pain.

Sesshomaru frowned. "You'd better not wake up yet." he breathed as he leaned close and began licking the deep cut on the younger male's chest and stomach. As soon as he tasted Inuyasha's human blood, he froze.

That was...interesting.

Inuyasha's blood tasted dark and sweet, like something forbidden. He shivered, then frowned at himself. His little brother was still bleeding, and he was the only one that could help. He could control himself. He took a deep breath and leaned forward to continue licking the wound.

He didn't realize he was moaning as the rich, sweet blood filled his mouth.

The wound wouldn't close, but it did stop bleeding. When Sesshomaru had assured himself of this, he slowly sat up, staring at Inuyasha. Even in the dark cave, his sharp eyes flicked over ebony hair and clawless hands. He found himself wondering what color human-Inuyasha's eyes were. Hmph, ridiculous. He did not care. Not at all.

With a frown, Sesshomaru leaned forward and used one finger to gently lift Inuyasha's top lip. No fangs.

His little brother didn't have anything to defend himself.

Sesshomaru tried to convince himself that this did not bother him as he moved away to lean against the cave wall. He kept his eyes on the defenseless, raven-haired human leaning against the other wall.

The Lord of the West waited patiently for his little brother to wake up.

 _End of Chapter 1: The Moonless Night_

Alright! Chapter 1 of my second fic! Hope everyone likes it!  
Reviews make my plot kittens happy!


	2. Waking Up

I do NOT own 'Inuyasha', Rumiko Takahashi does! I just do depraved things to the characters!

 **"New Moon Fears"  
**  
Thank you for all the support! I love all my readers!

Warnings-Language and a freaked-out Inuyasha? It'll be a bit before anything worth a serious warning happens.  


Chapter 2: Waking Up

Previously: * _The Lord of the West waited patiently for his little brother to wake up.*_

Pain and weakness.

These were the first things Inuyasha felt as he slowly woke up. He opened his eyes, blinking when darkness was all he saw. Damn weak-ass human senses! He stayed still and tried to make sense of what was going on. Ok...it was a new moon and he was in his vulnerable human form.

Well, _that_ sucked.

He vaguely remembered fighting a reptile demon that had been saying some very suggestive things. He shivered, feeling nauseous as he remembered smelling arousal on the scaly bastard before his senses had started to fade. Had he killed the demon?...No, Tetsusaiga had reverted as he'd weakened. His hand flicked to his side.

Huh...his Fang was safely sheathed at his waist.

Suddenly, his memory cleared some. A flash of silver and a deep, cold voice.

"Oh, fuck." Inuyasha breathed, feeling fear flood him. His eyes searched the oppressive darkness, but he couldn't see shit. He sniffed the air, knowing that wouldn't do any good to his human form, but it was an instinctive habit.

He kept one hand on Tetsusaiga's hilt, lifting his other hand to the wall behind him. Stone. He was in a cave. Ok, that wasn't too bad. He could follow the wall until he reached the opening. He started to stand, but a sharp pain shot across his chest and stomach. He glanced down, but couldn't see in the darkness. Carefully, he lowered one hand to feel cuts covering the front of his body. He sucked in a breath, hissing in pain when he found a bad one just above his stomach.

The gash was deep, but Inuyasha frowned when he realized he didn't feel any blood on his skin. Something...something strange was going on.

He needed to get out of here!

Trying to ignore the pain, he stood shakily, keeping one hand on the wall for support and guidance. As he took his first step, a deep, smooth voice sent shivers down his spine. "You should not be moving yet, Inuyasha. Where do you think you're going, anyways?"

Inuyasha froze, and he could feel himself trembling as his heart pounded. "Se...Sesshomaru?" He kept his head still, but his eyes searched the darkness frantically. His weak human ears were unable to tell where the voice had come from.

Then the lethal demon's voice came out of the dark again. "Inuyasha, you've gotten yourself into trouble this time. You almost got yourself molested by that reptile vermin."

Inuyasha was shaking as he cringed against the stone wall, doing his damnedest to suppress his terror as he whispered. "Did..did you..?" He was unable to finish, still trying to locate the Killing Perfection in what he knew had to be the darkest cave _ever_.

Sesshomaru's soft, hypnotic voice reached him again. "Yes, I did save you, Inuyasha, and no, I did not do anything to you while you were asleep. Except get that deeper wound to stop bleeding."

Inuyasha hesitated, knowing that he had no chance of escaping a predator youkai in the dark, especially as a human. He slid down the wall, keeping his back against it as he sat down and pulled his knees to his chest. His eyes searched the darkness in vain, knowing that his weak human eyes probably passed right over the lethal demon.

Inuyasha lifted one hand to his head, stroking his black hair nervously. "You...um..you can see me, can't you?"

The reply was immediate. "Yes."

Inuyasha lowered his forehead to his knees and raised both hands to cover his head. He had always been ashamed of his human night, and now that his perfect full-demon brother could _see_ him, _smell_ him in this pathetic, vulnerable form, Inuyasha felt as disgusting and weak as Sesshomaru had always said he was.

Inuyasha took a deep breath and prayed his voice didn't shake. "Look, if you're trying to freak me out, it's working. Human senses are so weak, I...I can't even tell how close you are. If you're gonna hurt me, you should go ahead, because this is really cruel, even for you." He heard a faint noise and tensed, only to hear that deep voice again.

"Calm yourself, Inuyasha. Relax, or you'll pass out again. You're breathing fast and shallow and your heart is beating too fast."

Almost driven mad by this whole situation, Inuyasha reacted like Inuyasha. He scoffed. "Relax?! Yeah, ok. I'll just relax. It's not like it's my human night and I'm stuck in a dark-ass cave with my only living relative, who just _happens_ to hate every damn thing about me! Why don't you relax?"

A calm voice replied. "Are you using sarcasm on me, Inuyasha? Really?"

Inuyasha felt fear flood him, and he began shaking again. He whispered. "I...I'm sorry."

Sesshomaru's voice had sounded closer that time, and Inuyasha cautiously raised his eyes. Nope, he still couldn't see anything in the suffocating darkness. He had no idea how close the powerful, dangerous demon was. Suddenly, there was a noise close to him. He jumped and ducked his head protectively, squeezing his eyes shut as tightly as he could.

He heard that quiet voice again. "Inuyasha, you can open your eyes."

He opened them just a fraction, realizing he could see light. His eyes shot wide open and he lifted his head.

Sesshomaru had built a small fire.

Inuyasha blinked as his human eyes adjusted to the change in light. He saw that his brother was sitting just a few feet away, watching him with narrowed amber eyes. Instinctively, he started to shift further away, only for the demon to growl softly.

"I would suggest you stay where you are, Inuyasha."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sesshomaru saw that Inuyasha had become stone-still when he growled. Wide violet eyes stared at him, and he could hear the pounding heart as the younger male held his breath.

He sighed. "Foolish pup, you need to breathe. Are you _trying_ to make yourself pass out? I know you're afraid, but do you really want to pass out...alone...with me?"

Inuyasha shook his head, black hair fluttering slightly. Sesshomaru heard the human take a quick, shaky breath, and he frowned. "Slow and steady, or you'll hyperventilate."

The fearful violet eyes watched him as Inuyasha gave a tiny nod and obediently tried to steady his breathing. Sesshomaru saw his little brother's eyes flick to the fire and back to him.

"Um...why did you build a fire?" the transformed hanyou asked tentatively.

He replied softly. "So you could see."

Inuyasha hugged his knees tighter to his chest. "I...I'm not trying to annoy you, but..why?"

Sesshomaru realized the younger male looked fearful of the answer. "Inuyasha, being in the dark was scaring you, so I built a fire. Do you think there is a malicious purpose behind everything I do?"

He watched as Inuyasha frowned and turned his gaze back to the fire before replying in a voice barely above a whisper. "No, not everything, just anything involving _me_. I can find cruelty behind anything you do that has to do with me."

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow, not sure if he was more concerned or amused. "Building a fire so you could see. Can you find a cruel intent behind that?"

Inuyasha glanced at him, then sighed and lowered his eyes to the cave floor. "Yeah. A couple different ones, actually. Maybe you want me to see your face before you kill me. Maybe you just wanted a better look at what a filthy little half-breed looks like as a filthy little human. Maybe...maybe you're just teasing me; making me think you're actually being nice before you poison me or tear my throat out or finally run me through with your new sword, Baksaiga."

Sesshomaru stared, no longer unsure if he was concerned or amused. He was definitely concerned. "Inuyasha?"

Slowly, those deep violet eyes lifted to his, and he saw that the human's body was shaking as he pressed harder into the stone wall behind him. Sesshomaru frowned.

"Maybe I just built the fire so you could see. So you wouldn't be so afraid." Sesshomaru shifted closer and saw Inuyasha flinch. He asked quietly. "What about saving you from that reptile?"

His little brother's scent spiked with fear as he whispered. "I heard you. You...you told him..that I belong to you. Well, you said 'the half-breed' belongs to you, and I didn't see any others. I...I know you have claimed my life as yours to take, Sesshomaru. You saved me because you're the only one allowed to kill me."

Sesshomaru felt that odd feeling in his stomach again. He tilted his head and frowned, murmuring. "You are more afraid of me than you were of him."

Inuyasha lowered his eyes, and Sesshomaru caught a bitter scent of shame as the pup breathed. "You're scarier."

That odd feeling got worse. Sesshomaru asked quietly. "Inuyasha, do you know what that vermin had planned for you?"

His little brother nodded, not meeting his eyes. "Basically. I...I smelled his arousal before my senses faded, and he was saying some awful things."

Sesshomaru felt his chest tighten. "You know what he intended to do to you, and you still find me scarier?"

Inuyasha shrugged, staring at the fire as though it could get him out of this cave. "I can't help it. You...I don't think you've ever touched me without trying to hurt me. You...you're kinda sadistic; I think you like hurting me. Between that and your claws and poison, it seems like you'd be well-suited to torture somebody. Like, oh, I don't know, somebody you hate for being born."

Sesshomaru moved a little closer and saw Inuyasha's body tense; he was within arm's reach of the younger male now.  
"Inuyasha, I am not planning to hurt you, much less torture you." he said softly.

Dark amethyst eyes lifted to his, and he saw the fear and doubt in them. Inuyasha whispered. "Do you really expect me to believe you?"

Sesshomaru moved even closer and saw the human start to lean away. He shifted so he was in front of Inuyasha instead of beside him. Now his little brother had nowhere to go, but was trying his damnedest to back up through the stone wall.

Slowly, Sesshomaru lifted one clawed hand to touch the lock of ebony hair that hung in front of Inuyasha's shoulder. The younger male had frozen, barely breathing and watching him with wide eyes. Careful of his claws, Sesshomaru moved his hand from the silky hair to gently graze his fingertips along a pale collarbone. He heard Inuyasha's heart skip a beat, then start pounding.

He saw a movement out of the corner of his eye. Keeping the fingertips of one hand on the pup's collarbone, he shot his other hand up to catch his brother's wrist. He glanced at the captured hand; from it's position, it looked like it had been aiming to slap him in the face. He looked back to the human, who looked shocked and terrified, and spoke calmly.

"Were you going to strike me? In this form, do you think you are fast enough or strong enough to attempt hitting me?"

Inuyasha shook his head frantically. "No! I..I didn't mean to! It just happened, like...like a reflex! I'm sorry!"

Sesshomaru sensed Inuyasha's overwhelming fear, and saw the wide, dark eyes focus on where the clawed hand was wrapped around his wrist. His little brother cringed and began trying to tug his hand free.

Sesshomaru frowned; he was not holding tightly at all, he couldn't be hurting the human. "Inuyasha?"

The violet eyes snapped shut and the younger male began panting and trembling violently.

Sesshomaru felt that damn odd feeling once again as he realized what his brother was afraid of at the moment.  
"Inuyasha, I am not going to poison you."

Eyes still closed, Inuyasha whispered. "Why not? You always do, and...I don't think I'd survive this time."

Slowly, Sesshomaru released the slender wrist. "That is why. I do not think you'd survive, either."

Inuyasha cautiously opened his eyes, looking confused. Sesshomaru met the wide violet eyes and resumed brushing his fingertips over the collarbone. He felt the human shiver when he gently glided his fingers around the base of that pale throat. He lightly traced his claws over the younger male's pulse, and Inuyasha shivered again.

"Scared?" Sesshomaru asked softly, sliding his fingertips up the side of the slender neck, thumb grazing Inuyasha's windpipe.

His little brother trembled and breathed. "Terrified." as Sesshomaru leaned closer.

.

 _End of Ch 2: "Waking Up"_

Poor Inuyasha, scared shitless! That's always fun to write!

Alright, I will probably not be updating every day like I did with 'The Right Choice' but I will update as regularly as possible, and don't worry, I will NOT leave it!


	3. Spoken Fears

DISCLAIMERS:Let me see…nope, still don't own anything but the story itself. 'Inuyasha' and characters still belong to Rumiko Takahashi. Brilliant lady :)

 **"New Moon Fears"**

Yep, still yaoi, still boyxboy, still brothers. Still with me? Good, please proceed.

 **Warnings** A kiss, a snarl, a still kinda freaked-out, confused Inuyasha, and *gasp* a _nice_ Sesshomaru?!

.

Chapter 3: Spoken Fear

 _*His little brother trembled and breathed. "Terrified." as Sesshomaru leaned closer.*_

Inuyasha felt his heart pounding as the lethal youkai shifted closer to him. He caught his breath when soft lips touched his own. Ohhh, that felt _good!_ He'd liked this hateful asshole for a while now, not that he'd ever tell him in this lifetime. He felt the slender fingers caressing his throat, sharp claws brushing the back of his neck.

He refused to let that get to him, because he understood why the demon's fingers seemed fascinated with his throat.  
Sesshomaru was a predator, a damn good one. Not that Inuyasha thought his brother intended to _eat_ him, no.  
Inuyasha understood he was a different kind of prey right now, and there was a good chance the demon liked feeling his throat; his pulse and his breathing...the predator in Sesshomaru likely enjoyed having contact with the vulnerable area.

He felt Sesshomaru's tongue brush against his lips, and he couldn't stop the soft whimper he made as he tentatively parted his lips for the youkai. When he whimpered, a clawed hand touched his hair. Unable to stop his reaction, he flinched, all previous thoughts fleeing from his mind.

He knew Sesshomaru's hands were dangerous. Why in the hell was he letting this cruel, dangerous, possibly psychotic demon touch him with hands that had hurt him so much? These hands had poisoned him, hit him, choked him and painfully pulled the Black Pearl out of his eye. Oh yeah, and one of these hands had once gone **through** his body!

When he flinched, the soft lips left his, and he opened his eyes to see his brother watching him. The hand that had touched his hair lowered to the demon's side, but the other stayed lightly against his throat.

Inuyasha had never been so conflicted. There was no way Sesshomaru could desire him, but how he wished he could! The youkai was beautiful and perfect, even in cruelty. Inuyasha swallowed the all-too-familiar pain of not being good enough for the demon lord. He had tried to deny it, but he loved the older male, even though he had told the truth earlier.

He really could find a malicious intent behind anything his brother did to him.

As if reading his thoughts, Sesshomaru tilted his head, murmuring. "Let me guess. You can even find a cruel purpose behind a kiss, can't you?"

Driven into a nervous wreck by his own thoughts, Inuyasha nodded, eyes fixed on the spiked armor as he spoke without really thinking. "The only reason I can think of for you to...to kiss me is to tease me. Trying to get my hopes up. You hate me as a hanyou, why would you like me any better as a human? If you can get my hopes up, you'd be able to break my heart."

Inuyasha felt the hand on his throat slide up until the sharp claws traced under his jaw, silently asking him to raise his eyes. He shivered and lifted his gaze to the demon's.

Sesshomaru spoke softly. "That sounds really twisted. You think I am that cruel?"

Inuyasha licked his lips and saw the youkai's amber eyes shift to watch. He whispered. "I...I do think you're _capable_ of being that cruel." When the golden eyes met his again, he continued. "Look, Sesshomaru. I...I don't know what's going on in that head of yours, I never do. But thank you for saving me from that reptile. You...you saved my life, and even if it's to kill me yourself...I'm still grateful. If I'm gonna die tonight, I'd rather it be at your hands than anybody else's."

Inuyasha watched the demon as he spoke, not even really realizing what he was actually saying. All he knew was that the words coming out of his mouth were ones he needed to say.

Sesshomaru was silent for long moments, long enough that Inuyasha began to wonder if he'd actually said anything, or if he'd just thought all that drivel. Finally, his big brother spoke in a softer tone than Inuyasha had ever heard from him. "Inuyasha, little brother, what did you mean by 'get your hopes up'?"

Inuyasha felt his eyes widen as a trace of panic hit him. Oh shit, what had he said? "No-nothing. I..um..I ramble when I'm nervous."

The older male's lips tilted up just a bit. "I noticed this. I also noticed that it seems to be honest rambling." The demon leaned a bit closer to whisper. "If I have the ability to get your hopes up or break your heart, that means you like me, don't you?"

Inuyasha stopped breathing as he stared into his brother's honey eyes. "I...I'm sorry. I shouldn't...like you."

He was surprised when Sesshomaru sighed. "Because we're both males, or because we're related?"

Inuyasha frowned, he knew neither of those things mattered to demons, and they didn't matter to him. "Neither. I shouldn't like you because you're the most dangerous person I know and you hate me. That's not a good combination to fall in lo-" he stopped abruptly and saw Sesshomaru's eyes widen.

He desperately tried to repair the mistake he'd just made. "No, that's not what I meant! It's not a good combination to like! I-" he was cut off by his brother's lips covering his own. Caught in the middle of talking, his lips and fangs were already parted. Inuyasha moaned when a sweet tongue slipped into his mouth and began gently exploring him.

Unable to help himself, Inuyasha moaned again, leaning in and shyly kissing back. He felt slender fingers thread into his hair above the back of his neck, pulling gently to tilt his head so that the demon could deepen the kiss.

Mmmm, Sesshomaru tasted sweet and powerful, and it was driving Inuyasha insane.

He felt sharp fangs brush his lip, but before he could react, something else happened.

Out of nowhere, a fierce snarl surrounded him and vibrated the mouth against his. As a human, Inuyasha was unable to understand, so the sudden snarl scared him. He jerked away from the canine demon in fear, but forgot how close he was to the wall.

He slammed into the stone, hitting the back of his head and making the wound between his chest and stomach throb. With a groan, he lifted one hand to the back of his head and lowered the other to his stomach.

"That was smart." he muttered to himself. He glanced up to see Sesshomaru breathing hard and staring at him in bewilderment.

The demon asked. "Are you ok, Inuyasha? Why did you pull away like that?"

Inuyasha sighed at the fool he'd just made of himself. "You snarled at me. Right now, I don't have any canine in me. I...I don't have the ability to understand canine sounds, like a snarl. I thought...I might have done..or said..something to make you angry."

He watched as Sesshomaru shook his head, still panting just a bit. "Not angry. Snarled in arousal. I didn't think about your senses being weak, and that you wouldn't be able to tell from my scent."

Inuyasha felt a blush crossing his cheeks. "You were aroused? By..um..by me?"

His brother looked like he would've rolled his eyes, if he ever deigned to act in such a way. "Did you see me kissing anybody else?"

Inuyasha started to shake his head, only to stop when it throbbed. Damn, he'd hit his head hard! He groaned and heard Sesshomaru ask softly. "Are you ok? You hit the wall rather hard."

Surprised that the demon was asking about his well-being, Inuyasha met the amber eyes and gave a small nod. "Yeah, I'm alright. Thanks for asking. Normally, that wouldn't have really hurt, but as a human, my pain tolerance is a lot lower. I hate this! I hate the new moon and being human!"

He lifted his knees back to his chest and hugged them as he continued. "I...I'm weak...in so many ways. I'm easily hurt, I can't control my emotions _at all_ , and I'd give anything to know your scent when you're aroused. And, not only can I not understand canine sounds, I...I don't even have the ability to make them!"

Sesshomaru leaned against his raised knees. "Really?" the demon asked, lifting one hand to gently stroke his hair.

Inuyasha sighed, deciding to ignore the clawed hand for now. If Sesshomaru was gonna hurt him, it wasn't like he could stop him any-damn-ways. "Yeah. My vocal cords change or something when...when I'm human. I can't growl or anything. I can _try_ , but it doesn't sound right. I just sound like a human trying to sound like a dog. It..it's pathetic."

He watched as the beautiful youkai tilted his head and murmured. "I would like to hear this."

Inuyasha frowned and raised an eyebrow at the older male. "I don't think so. You have enough shit to use against me without something to make fun of."

Sesshomaru shook his head. "I will not make fun of you. Growl for me; I will not tell anyone."

Inuyasha hesitated, then sighed, felling an odd tug on his heart as Sesshomaru looked at him expectantly.

"Alright, but please don't laugh at me." Inuyasha cleared his throat, then gave his most vicious growl. With a human voice, it was more of a "Grrrrrrr". He closed his eyes in defeat. "See? Is that not the saddest thing you've ever heard?"

He heard the soft reply. "No. The saddest thing I have ever heard is that I scare you more that a demon that planned to rape you. Compared to that, your growl was not that bad."

Inuyasha opened his eyes to see Sesshomaru staring at the ground, and he asked quietly. "Why did you save me from him, Sesshomaru?"

Golden eyes lifted to his. "I...I didn't want that to happen to you."

Inuyasha's eyes might have been human, but he still saw something wrong in his brother's amber gaze. He asked very softly. "Sesshomaru, what happened?"

.

.

 _End of Ch 3: Spoken Fears_

Whew! This seemed like it took forever to type! Hmmm, what secret does Sesshy have?

Next Chapter-Chapter 4: Still Jumpy

In which we have Sesshomaru telling a secret, a very protective Inuyasha, and Sess tries to make Inu more comfortable. 


	4. Still Jumpy

Disclaimer-I do not own, this makes me groan. Only the story came from my head, if I owned, Sess would be in my bed.

 **"New Moon Fears"**

Warnings-Language, mild reference to rape, slightly angsty emotions.

Thank you to all my lovely readers, reviewers, and followers. You guys are incredible, and give me the strength to type out my depravity!

Chapter 4: Still Jumpy

 _*Inuyasha's eyes might have been human, but he still saw something wrong in his brother's amber gaze. He asked very softly. "Sesshomaru, what happened?"*_

The youkai watched him for a long moment before replying. "Father died, and it devastated me. I lost my mind and went on a rampage, killing any demon unlucky enough to cross my path. The problem was, I hadn't reached my mature strength yet. About a week or so after Father died, I made the mistake of challenging a demon that was far too strong for me to handle. It was barely a fight, and what he did to me afterwards lasted longer than the fight itself."

Inuyasha couldn't breathe, horrified by the thought of anyone taking his proud, powerful brother against his will. Rage boiled up inside him until he couldn't see straight. How dare somebody violate his beautiful Sesshomaru?! He didn't even realize he was trying to stand until he was gently pulled back down and clawed fingers carefully grasped his chin.

A soothing voice reached him through his haze of anger. "Look at me, little one."

Inuyasha blinked and focused on warm golden eyes. He realized he was panting and that his lip was curled like he was baring fangs he didn't even have at the moment.

The demon spoke softly. "It is ok, my fierce little brother. I tracked him down a few months later when my strength matured. You were right when you said I'd be well-suited to torture somebody. I made him beg for death for a long time before I granted it."

Inuyasha felt his anger settle down, and he nodded, muttering. "Good, cause I would've found him myself, fucked him up real good, let him bleed to death for what he did."

Sesshomaru gave the smallest smile, then leaned forward to kiss his forehead. "I know, little one. You were ready to avenge me, were you not?"

Inuyasha felt his cheeks warming as he realized how he'd just been acting, and in front of the most composed person he knew. And had Sesshomaru just _smiled_ at him?

He gazed at those beautifully hypnotic amber eyes and whispered. "Um...yeah. I was. I really can't control my emotions on a new moon. Was I really about to try to track down a demon while in my human form?"

Sesshomaru nodded." I don't think I've ever seen you so angry, little brother." The demon leaned closer and whispered into his ear. "All that fury...just because somebody hurt me. You do like me, don't you, _Inuyasha_?"

Inuyasha shivered at the way the older male said his name, all soft and sensual, and nodded his reply to the question. He felt an arm slide around his waist just as clawed fingers slid into his hair. Soft lips brushed against his, then moved to his neck, and Inuyasha suddenly couldn't think of a damn thing besides the fact that he did _not_ want Sesshomaru to stop... _e_ _ver..._

The demon began placing sensual, open-mouthed kisses up and down the side of his throat, and Inuyasha moaned, tilting his head to the side to offer more access to the sensitive area. As a reward, he felt a warm, wet tongue sweep up from his collarbone to the spot right below his ear. This made him shiver in pleasure as he whimpered at his brother. "Ah Sess...Sesshomaru."

The youkai growled very softly against his throat and began suckling on his pulse, hand tightening in his hair. Inuyasha sighed at the sensation and lowered his knees to slide his feet out on either side of the magnificent demon. With another soft growl, Sesshomaru shifted closer and began spreading the sensual kisses and tender licks over more of his neck and shoulder.

Inuyasha panted as tingly fire flooded his veins. "Ahh mmmhmmm oh Sesshomaru."

Suddenly, he froze as sharp fangs brushed his heated flesh. _'No, don't be afraid, don't you dare be afraid!'_ he mentally lectured as he struggled to suppress his sudden fear, but it was all for naught. Being human and vulnerable, the lethal fangs that could steal his life with no effort frightened him. Sesshomaru was stronger and faster than him normally, even more so now. And the demon had said, more than once, that he was going to kill him.

But, gods, how he wished he hadn't become afraid. Sesshomaru had not been hurting him, and the attention had felt _so damn good_!

Inuyasha felt tears gather in his eyes as his brother lifted his head and sniffed, surely scenting his fear. The hand in his hair slowly loosened and slipped away, as did the one around his waist. The loss of contact devastated him, and he whimpered softly, instinctively trying to make the canine sound for an apology, then forced it into words.

"I'm so, so sorry, Sesshomaru. Please don't be mad."  
.

xxxxxxxxxx  
.

Sesshomaru inhaled deeply, catching the myriad of scents from his little brother as he slowly released him.

Fear, shame, and the salty scent of tears had eclipsed the tempting scent of Inuyasha's arousal and desire.

He felt the human trembling, and realized the younger male was apologizing in shaky words intermingled with tiny whimpers. "I'm so, so sorry, Sesshomaru. Please don't be mad."

He felt his armor shift and glanced down to see Inuyasha's hands gripping the top edge of his chestplate between the spikes. He lifted his gaze, chest tightening as small tears began sliding down his brother's pale cheeks. He lifted his hand to the pup's face to gently stroke the tears away, murmuring. "It's ok, little one. Please don't cry."

Those big, dark eyes lifted to his as Inuyasha, for some reason, continued to apologize. "I am really sorry, big brother. I don't _want_ to be afraid of you, I...I never have. Please don't be mad at me."

Sesshomaru felt an odd twist in his stomach as he remembered his little brother saying the same thing earlier while unconcious. He knew why Inuyasha feared him...it was mostly _his_ own fault , after all.

He shook his head as he whispered to the pup. "Shhh, I am not angry with you. I am sorry that I scared you."

Sesshomaru watched surprise fill those dark amethyst eyes, and knew that his apology had caught the younger male completely off-guard. Inuyasha's head tilted to the side just a bit, an action Sesshomaru recognized immediately. If the human had been a hanyou, those velvety ears would be twitching in the cutest way.

He continued gazing at his brother as Inuyasha spoke softly. "It...it's ok. You don't have to..to say that; I know you weren't trying to scare me or anything. I told you, I can't control my emotions when I'm...like this. It wasn't your fault."

Sesshomaru saw that Inuyasha still had a death-grip on his armor. He lifted his hands and flicked his fingers over the red ties, then shrugged out of the confining gear. He gently pulled it out of a stunned-looking Inuyasha's grip and set it aside before shaking himself a bit, humming in satisfaction at the freedom. "That is much better."

He glanced to his brother, smirking when he saw that Inuyasha was..well..staring at him. Openly.

"See something you like?" Sesshomaru asked.

The dark eyes flicked up to his, and a heartbeat later, the human version of his brother blushed as red as the fire-rat hakamas he wore. "I...um...I don't think I've ever seen you without your armor."

At those words, Sesshomaru felt something he hadn't felt in _centuries_.

He felt playful.

He arched one eyebrow at the younger male, who tilted his head as if sensing something was up. Sesshomaru fought the small smile threatening to curve his lips as he spoke casually. "Seeing me without my armor causes that kind of reaction? Hmmm what if I were to do this?"

The demon lord smoothly divested himself of his haori and undershirt, letting the silky fabric pool around his hips. He was now bare from the hips up, and he watched as Inuyasha's eyes widened appreciatively. He did not normally like others seeing him, but he found he didn't mind the way his little brother's eyes roved him now.

He heard the younger male murmur, "You're gorgeous." as the dark eyes followed his lean body down to his hips, where a set of pinkish-purple demon markings peeked above the edge of his hakamas. Then Inuyasha gave a little sigh. "I always wished I had demon markings. Yours are really beautiful."

Sesshomaru tilted his head. "Inuyasha, do you know what you look like in your demon form?"

The pup shook his head, and Sesshomaru lifted a hand to trace those pale cheeks as he breathed. "You _do_ have demon markings. One stripe on each cheek, like Father had. They are the same shape as his, jagged like lightning, but the color is closer to mine."

Inuyasha whispered. "Really?"

Sesshomaru nodded. "They unnerved me a bit the first time I saw them, actually. I got the color of my markings from my mother, yet your color is a lot closer to mine than Father's. His were dark, dark blue, like my crescent moon. Yours are a purplish color, only a few shades darker than my own stripes, but I believe they would lighten if you were to gain more control of that form."

Inuyasha looked surprised, but nodded slowly to show he was listening. The younger male said quietly. "Thank you for telling me all of that, Sesshomaru. About me, about Father, and..and about you." Then the dark eyes began to wander his body again.

Sesshomaru said softly. "Inuyasha, I have a question for you."

His brother met his eyes, tilting his head curiously. "What's that?"

Sesshomaru tried to phrase his question carefully. "I know you desire me, little brother. However, I have noticed that, other than holding onto my armor like it was trying to get away, you have made no attempts to touch me. Why is this?"

He saw that Inuyasha looked ashamed as he answered in a whisper. "Well..I actually _wanted_ to touch you, but I...I wasn't sure how you might react. I, um, I thought it might make you mad. And I'm scared of making you mad."

Through his senses, Sesshomaru could tell Inuyasha was mortified that he felt this way, even more so to be admitting it.

He felt that odd feeling again, the feeling that twisted in his gut whenever Inuyasha's fear of him and his anger became obvious.

Again, his brother's earlier unconcious words came to him, and they prompted his response. "Inuyasha, not everything you do makes me mad. But I do understand why you would think so."

Sesshomaru could feel the younger male's eyes on him as he thought for a moment. He met the dark violet gaze when he spoke. "You know, Inuyasha, I just realized something. This whole time, you've been between the cave wall and me. I've basically had you trapped, and that is most likely not helping with your fear."

He moved away a little, seeing surprise and confusion in the wide, dark eyes as Inuyasha asked. "What are you doing?"

The demon sat with his back against the cave wall next to his brother.

Sesshomaru tapped his claws on the ground in front of him as he said softly. "Move here."

x

x

 _End of Chapter 4: Still Jumpy_

x

x

Alrighty then! How's it going so far? Having a bit of trouble with the Chapter thing this one; I didn't separate this story into chapters when I originally wrote it. (actually, that is true for a few of my fics.)

And, of course, I'm still fine-tuning it as I type it. ( EX: the marking convo wasn't so long, but when I started typing that part, my plot kittens said it seemed significant)

 _Next time-x-Chapter 5: Unexpected Praise_

In which we will see what happens when a human Inuyasha o.d.'s on praise he never thought he'd receive.


	5. Unexpected Praise

_Disclaimer: No, I have not magically obtained any rights to 'Inuyasha' or associated characters._

 **.**

 **"New Moon Fears"**

Thanks again to all my lovely readers! You guys rock!

 **.**

Chapter Warnings: None really, other than a ridiculously emotional Inuyasha. Please, no flames on him being ooc, I am aware of how I wrote this. In the anime, Inu said that on a new moon, he is _overcome_ by strong human emotions.

 **Chapter 5: Unexpected Praise**

Previously-* _Sesshomaru tapped his claws on the ground in front of him as he said softly. "Move here."_

Sesshomaru watched as Inuyasha slowly crawled to kneel in front of him, and he took a deep breath to analyze his brother's scent. The younger male was nervous, but there was no actual fear in his scent at the moment.

Sesshomaru asked softly. "Do you think this will help?"

Inuyasha tilted his head and answered shyly. "I think so. You...you still make me nervous, but I do feel a lot better not being against the wall. Thank you."

Sesshomaru caught his breath as Inuyasha smiled for the first time since waking up in the dark. He watched as his little brother began nervously stroking his long black hair, and he realized it was a self-concious gesture.

He said softly. "Relax, Inuyasha. You look fine. I like the way you look as a human. You are very attractive as a hanyou, but the dark hair and eyes suit you very well."

He saw the surprise wash over the younger male, and Inuyasha blushed, murmuring. "Oh..um..thank you. That's not really something I ever expected to hear you say."

Sesshomaru's eyebrows shot up as Inuyasha giggled, still blushing. "Are you ok?" he asked.

Inuyasha blushed even harder and kept giggling as he spoke. "You like the way I look as a human and as a hanyou. The Killing Perfection just _complimented_ me!"

Sesshomaru tilted his head, realizing his praise had pleased Inuyasha, and remembered that the human didn't have much control over his emotions. He smiled to himself as he realized that if he were to give the genuine praise the pup deserved, he would make his little brother happy and relaxed.

Deciding some long-held honesty was in order, he said softly. "You look adorable right now. And, you should know that I am very proud of you. You've done very well with Tetsusaiga, little one."

His theory was confirmed as Inuyasha began practically wriggling in pleasure, blushing hard and grinning like a fool. "Really? You..you really mean that?"

Sesshomaru nodded, wondering why he hadn't said this before. "Yes. The Red Tetsusaiga that breaks barriers, the Dragon-Scale Tetsusaiga that absorbs demonic energy, and Adamant Barrage are all abilities you acquired on your own. I'm sorry I never told you this, but I am impressed by all the progress you've made with the Fang."

He saw that Inuyasha looked surprised and pleased, and the pup scooted closer, staring up at him with those wide, dark eyes and whispering. "I didn't even know that you knew I have all those. So..you're proud of me? And...and you were impressed by something **I** did?"

Sesshomaru nodded, asking softly. "That means a lot to you, doesn't it?"

Inuyasha nodded shyly before lowering his eyes, breathing. "Thank you."

Sesshomaru realized he had something else he needed to tell Inuyasha, something the orphaned pup needed to hear. He said quietly. "Inuyasha, look at me." The violet eyes lifted back to his, and he spoke softly.

"Father...and your mother...would both have been very proud of you, as well. You are strong, brave, and smart. No matter what happens to you, you always come out better for it. You are also kind and you have a really good heart. They would both have been so proud of you, little one."

Inuyasha began shaking a little and Sesshomaru could smell tears that did not fall, yet the younger male smiled bravely at him. "You really think so?" the human asked as he shifted closer.

Sesshomaru smiled and lifted one hand to stroke silky black hair, relieved when Inuyasha didn't flinch or pull away.

"Little brother, they would be fools to not be proud of the man their son has become."

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Inuyasha could feel himself relaxing into the hand that gently stroked his hair. The things Sesshomaru had said filled a void in his soul that he had never paid attention to.

His big brother was proud of him, and thought his parents would be, too.

He started to scoot closer to the demon, then hesitated, unsure of himself.

Sesshomaru seemed to notice, and said gently. "You can touch me if you want. I won't get mad."

Inuyasha leaned forward and hugged his youkai half-brother around the neck. He felt slender arms wrap around his waist as he buried his face against the warm, slightly sweet-smelling neck. He whispered. "Thank you, aniki."

He felt Sesshomaru nuzzle against his hair and heard the soft reply. "You are welcome, otouto. Hmmm, by the way, you smell good as a human."

Blushing, Inuyasha lowered his arms from around the older male's neck, leaning back a bit to look the demon in the face. In response to his moves, he felt the arms around his waist loosen some, but they stayed around him. He felt self-concious about what Sesshomaru had just said, and he said softly. "I wouldn't know. See, by the time my scent changes, my senses have already weakened. I'm not really sure how I smell as a human."

Sesshomaru tilted his head, giving him a slow smile. "Then trust _my_ nose; you do smell good. Taste good, too."

Inuyasha smiled back as the demon lord leaned forward, and smooth lips touched his own. The youkai's kiss was tender, the sweet lips caressing his and coaxing them open. He moaned softly as he tentatively kissed back, savoring the sweet taste of his dangerous brother. Sesshomaru gently suckled on his bottom lip, and he laid his shaking hands on a solid chest as he leaned closer to the older male.

Then Inuyasha felt sharp fangs brush his lip, and he couldn't stop the small whimper he made as he flinched. The arms around his waist tightened slightly and the soft lips left his.

Sesshomaru whispered against his ear. "Please don't pull away, little one. Do...do you not trust that I won't hurt you?"

Inuyasha hesitated, and he knew that gave the demon lord his answer. He lowered his eyes, ashamed by his fear and frustrated that it kept getting in the way. "I'm sorry. Again." he muttered, more angry with himself than he could ever remember being.

He felt Sesshomaru take a deep breath. "Inuyasha, if I swear not to hurt you, would you feel safer?"

Inuyasha thought about this for a moment before slowly shaking his head. "Not really. You...um...you've sworn to kill me, more than once."

He heard a small sigh. "I suppose you have a point there."

Inuyasha felt clawed fingers touch his chin gently, and he raised his had to meet amber eyes that glowed in the firelight. Sesshomaru watched him for a long moment, then, just as Inuyasha was starting to feel self-concious, the demon spoke softly.

"I have never made you a promise, have I?"

Inuyasha gave a tiny shake of his head. "I...I don't think so."

He watched the warm golden eyes as both clawed hands moved to frame his face. His brother spoke in the most gentle tone Inuyasha had ever heard from the older male.

"Inuyasha, I promise that I will not intentionally hurt you with my claws, fangs, poison, or with my strength. Not with my words, either. Will you accept this promise and _try_ to trust that you are safe with me?"

Inuyasha was touched, and he leaned into the demon's hands. Hmmm if he'd thought he loved Sesshomaru before that...  
His brother had promised not to hurt him, and wasn't even asking for solid trust right away; just wanted him to at least try.  
He smiled and tilted his head at the stunning youkai. "I think you covered all the most immediate dangers" he saw Sessomaru's lips curving up a fraction, and he continued. "Just so you know, with my senses being so weak, I can't sense deceit. But I will accept your promise, and I'll do my absolute best to trust you. At..at least for tonight."

Inuyasha felt his heart pounding as Sesshomaru smiled at him _,_ and his big brother said softly. "That will work for now, little one".

.

 _End of ch5:_ _Unexpected Praise_

.

Hmmmm, sorry if there's any errors. Not feeling hot today, but still wanted to get this out for ya'll. I'll come back and check it/fix it when I'm feeling better.

I totally got emotional when writing the 'praise' scene, esp when Sess said Inu's parents would've been proud of him.

I'd love to know how ya'll think it's going! :)

oh next chapter-Chapter 6: Trying To Trust

Might be considered fluff? Not sure what to say about this next one, but I like it *shrug*


	6. Trying To Trust

Disclaimers-I do not own 'Inuyasha'. If I did, would I be on here? No, I'd be having me some fun ;)

 **"New Moon Fears"  
**

Thank you to all my readers and reviewers, followers and friends.

Warnings: Some fluffiness, blood-tasting, ummm and I don't know if honeysuckle grows in Japan, but just go with it, please :)

Chapter 6: Trying To Trust

Previously- _*Inuyasha felt his heart pounding as Sesshomaru smiled at him and his big brother said softly. "That will work for now, little one."_

Inuyasha stayed still as the demon slowly leaned closer. Soft, warm lips brushed against his neck, and he tilted his head invitingly, exposing more of the sensitive flesh. He took a deep breath, smiling as his human nose finally recognized the sweetness of the youkai's scent.

He murmured. "I like the way you smell."

The powerful demon hummed against his throat. "Really? I thought you couldn't get my scent while human?"

Inuyasha shivered with desire as the soft lips caressed his pulse. "Not your regular scent. Normally, you have a complicated scent; sweet spices, demonic power, sometimes blood, and your pack, plus anger. But all I can smell right now is..." he stopped and blushed harder, wondering if the regal youkai would think him silly.

Sesshomaru growled very softly against the side of his neck. "Tell me, little one. What does your big brother smell like to a human nose?"

Inuyasha whispered. "You smell...and taste...like honeysuckle nectar. I...I like it."

He felt his brother lick his pulse, making him shiver while slender fingers threaded into his hair. Under the pounding of his heart, he heard Sesshomaru whisper something he didn't catch. "Wha-what?" he panted, not wanting to ignore whatever the older male had said.

Sesshomaru lifted his head and met his eyes. Inuyasha realized the mighty demon lord almost looked self-concious as he spoke quietly. "My dark angel. That's what I said. That's what you are. A beautiful dark angel. Does that sound foolish?"

Inuyasha shook his head as he felt a grin crossing his face. "You forgot how easy it is to flatter me when I'm human. It doesn't sound foolish at all. I like it. I liked it better with 'my' in front of it, though." he finished in a shy whisper.

Sesshomaru smiled and leaned closer. Inuyasha's eyes slid closed and he sighed as warm breath ghosted over his ear. "My brave, beautiful dark angel."

He felt the soft lips feather over the curve of his jaw, grazing the sensitive spot right below his ear. He shivered and gave a soft whimper of desire as he tilted his head again, baring his throat. He felt the smooth lips pause at his whimper, and heard Sesshomaru sniff. He reassured the demon. "Good whimper. Please don't stop."

Inuyasha sighed in relief as the lips continued caressing his vulnerable throat. He heard Sesshomaru whisper. "Remember my promise, little one." and the soft lips gave way to sharp fangs.

Inuyasha only tensed for a heartbeat, then the deadly fangs began lightly grazing the side of his neck. He felt himself relaxing as no pain came, and it started to feel good... _really_ good. He knew that because of his brother's promise, he didn't need to fear the lethal fangs, and he started to actually respond to the sense of danger the powerful youkai evoked in him.

Sesshomaru was still dangerous, but was being so gentle with him. This was incredibly touching and arousing to the emotional roller-coaster that was human Inuyasha.

He whimpered and tried to shift closer, only to feel the clawed hands tighten on his waist and the fangs leave his skin. His big brother's voice rumbled around him.

"Do not move when my fangs are on you. You almost pushed yourself right into them. I promised not to intentionally hurt you; that does not mean I want to accidentally hurt you. Understand?"

Inuyasha met the narrowed amber eyes and nodded, apologizing softly. "I'm sorry. I...I was just trying to get closer to you."

Sesshomaru tilted his head, losing his irritated look. "You want to be closer to me? How close?"

Inuyasha blushed as he whispered. "As close as I could get without making you mad."

He heard the soft reply. "As my dark angel wishes."

Inuyasha felt himself being lifted by his waist, and when Sesshomaru set him back down, he was straddling the demon's lap. He could feel the heat and hardness of the youkai's body through their hakamas as Sesshomaru raised his knees to support him from behind.

Inuyasha leaned against the warm thighs and grinned at his brother, who smirked and asked. "Close enough, little brother?"

He nodded, still grinning. "And I still have room to move."

Sesshomaru tilted his head and said quietly. "You know, in this position, if you get scared, it won't be as easy to get away from me."

Inuyasha started to shrug, then winced as the movement irritated the wound that crossed the top of his stomach and bottom of his chest. "How do I keep forgetting this?" he hissed, lowering one hand to cover the injury.

Sesshomaru pulled his hand away to look at the vicious cut. "It would not heal because of your human form, but I licked it to stop the bleeding. Apparently, the pain-killing properties of my saliva do work on this form; that is why it doesn't hurt unless you irritate it directly."

Inuyasha found himself staring at the beautiful demon with wide eyes. "So..you..you tasted my blood?"

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Sesshomaru lifted his eyes to meet his brother's, seeing that Inuyasha looked both intensely curious and slightly alarmed. The younger male knew tasting blood was a mating ritual.

He spoke gently. "Relax, it's ok. Yes, I tasted it, and yes, I.. _reacted_ to it. I am capable of controlling myself, Inuyasha." He watched as his little brother blushed, then asked shyly.

"So..um..how did you react?"

Sesshomaru watched those big, dark eyes as he spoke softly, a rumble of pleasure lacing his words at the memory. "I liked it. Your blood tastes dark and sweet, like some kind of forbidden fruit. It was _divine_."

His dark angel tilted his head and whispered. "I'd like to see this. I want to see how you react to my blood."

Sesshomaru shook his head, even as his heart started pounding and his mouth watered at the thought of more. "No, little one. You are not bleeding, and I will not draw your blood. I refuse to break the first promise I've ever made to you."

He saw a movement out of the corner of his eye.

His little brother's hand had drifted to the handle of Tetsusaiga.

"Inuyasha..." he said in a warning tone.

The younger male smiled at him. "Your promise will stay intact. Even a human can see what you want right now. You're not the only stubborn one in this family."

Sesshomaru heard the _'fssst'_ of Tetsusaiga being drawn just a couple inches out of it's sheath.

"Inuyasha, don't!" His hand shot out to grab the slender wrist, but it was too late.

Inuyasha had slid his palm over the edge of the Fang, making a cut that, while shallow, immediately filled the air with the scent of his blood.

"Dammit, Inuyasha." Sesshomaru breathed as he carefully lifted the wrist he held. Ruby drops of the tempting blood gathered on Inuyasha's palm, and Sesshomaru growled softly at the sight. He lifted his eyes to see that Inyuasha was watching him.  
He gave a soft whine and his little brother smiled at him. "You have not broken your promise; you did not hurt me. Taste my blood, Sesshomaru, it's ok."

Sesshomaru felt himself shaking as he lowered his eyes to the hand he held by the wrist.  
He wanted that blood.  
Inuyasha had offered, so he had no reason to feel guilty.  
And, he hadn't broken his promise.

He inhaled the scent of his dark angel's blood and shivered. He kept his careful hold of the wrist and gently wrapped his other hand around Inuyasha's fingers before lowering his head.

Sesshomaru traced the tip of his tongue through the small, warm pool of blood in his brother's palm.

Immediately, that sweet, dark, _forbidden_ taste exploded in his mouth and sent waves of electric sparks through his body. He felt himself shaking and he growled softly as he buried his face in Inyasha's hand, licking at the blood greedily.

He felt a clawless hand stroking his hair gently, and heard the reassuring voice. "That's it, beautiful Sesshomaru. You like that, don't you?"

Unable to help himself, he nodded urgently, keeping the bottom half of his face buried against Inuyasha's hand.

Sesshomaru moaned out loud in pleasure when he caught the scent of human arousal.

.

.

 _End of ch 6-Trying To Trust_

Yeah, I think they made some progress in the trust department :)

Next Time-Chapter 7: Whimper for Me

I'd say citrusy, not quite a serious lemon...yet *winks* and Inuyasha might find out something he never knew...

How are the chapter lengths?

I am trying to post as regularly as possible, but I'm still fine-tuning it from my notebook and all, plus my plot kittens are trying to get me to start posting another one at the same time!

I know some authors can post multiple stories at the same time, but I don't know if I could handle that *sweatdrops* I guess we'll see who wins...

Oh, and THANK YOU to anyone who has voted on the poll on my profile!  
{How do you like yaoi fics written length-wise? multiple-choice and it's still there}

42% It doesn't matter, as long as it's good

21% Several long chapters

14% One-shot

14% Few long chapters

7% Few short chapters

0 Several short chappies

A lot of the stories I've written are pretty damn long, so these results work for me. I just need to know how long the chappies need to be. Am I making them long enough?


	7. Whimper For Me

**Disclaimer: Hmm do I really need to do this every time? I do not own anything but this depraved piece of fiction :)**

 **"New Moon Fears"**

Thank you to everybody that is reading, reviewing, following, or fave'ing my work, and all the lovely suggestions I have received regarding future work. When I post fics in the future, I'll try to notify y'all, or warn anyone that won't like the specific story I'm posting ;)

 **.** _Sorry about the long wait; youtube is very distracting!_

Warnings: Seriously inappropriate behavior, a bit of self-angst in Inuyasha when he finds out something he didn't know.

 **Chapter 7: Whimper For Me**

Previously _*Sesshomaru moaned out loud in pleasure when he caught the scent of human arousal.*_

Sesshomaru gently ran his tongue over the cut itself, stopping the blood flow. As he licked every trace of the intoxicating blood off of his brother's hand, he lifted his eyes to Inuyasha's face.

The dark, beautiful human had his violet eyes half-closed and he was panting softly. "Ah...ah...mmm Sesshomaru." the younger male whimpered, starting to squirm a little on his lap.

Sesshomaru exercised his self-control, reining in his own fierce arousal to focus on his suffering dark angel. "It's ok, I can help, my precious little one." He released Inuyasha's hand and reached out to caress the hard bulge through the fire-rat hakamas.

Inuyasha whimpered at the contact, and Sesshomaru felt the hand on his head sink into his hair as the human's hips twitched, hearing the pleading voice. "Ahh-ha...ohh please, Sesshomaru."

Sesshomaru carefully tugged down the edge of Inuyasha's hakamas, freeing a straining erection. "Oh my, that is impressive, Inuyasha." he breathed as he ran his fingertips along the pulsing length, feeling his brother's heartbeat in the veins.

Inuyasha spoke in a voice that was half-hiss, half-whimper. "F-f-fuck Sesshomaru, fucking t-tease. I c-can't handle this. It h-h-hurts. Please, Se...Sesshomaruuuuu!"

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow, whispering. "A tease, am I?" just as he wrapped his hand firmly around the throbbing member.

He smiled when the human's hips jerked and Inuyasha gasped. "Oh, gods, big brother! Ohhh f-fuck!" the younger male whimpered as he immediately began rocking his hips against the demon's touch, clawless hands bracing themselves on said demon's chest.

Sesshomaru firmly stroked the aching length, his own body burning as the scent of Inuyasha's scent of arousal surrounded him. He breathed deeply, feeling a soul-deep satisfaction that he was responsible for this level of desire in his fierce little brother. He reached out with his free hand to guide the trembling human to lean against his chest as he continued stroking him.

He felt Inuyasha's panting whimpers against his neck and clawless hands slip into his hair to hold tightly. He sped up his firm strokes as he used his free hand to gently move the silky black hair off of his brother's neck. Sesshomaru nuzzled the warm flesh he'd exposed, murmuring. "My dark angel. I love the way you respond to me. Keep whimpering for me, little brother."

Inuyasha's desperate whimpers came louder and faster, and Sesshomaru knew the pressure was building to unbearable levels.

Sesshomaru kissed the human's neck, caressing the tender flesh with his lips and tongue and growling softly at the taste of that smooth skin. He found himself wanting to taste it all.

He heard Inuyasha breathe through his whimpers. "Fangs. Please...please put your fangs on me."

Sesshomaru continued growling softly as he bared his fangs and carefully grazed them along Inuyasha's neck, feeling him tremble.

"Come for me, my precious dark angel." Sesshomaru whispered as he pressed his fangs lightly to the back of his little brother's neck.

A scream of pleasure was muffled against his shoulder as Inuyasha's release hit him, and he could've sworn the muffled scream had involved his name and a few vulgar words. Warm, slick seed covered his stomach, and he gentled his stokes to coax the human's full release out of him.

Sesshomaru felt Inuyasha's body shaking violently with surprisingly powerful aftershocks, and he began raining tender kisses over any part of his little brother he could reach; the ebony hair, the slender neck, the broad shoulder. All the while, he whispered praise in-between kisses. "That's it, otouto. You did so well, my little one. So beautiful and responsive. My sweet dark angel."

Slowly, Inuyasha stopped trembling and panting, and Sesshomaru felt a shaky, but contented sigh against his neck, which made him smile as he asked softly. "Feel better?"

A soft moan answered him. "So much." Inuyasha shifted a bit, then groaned. "I'm sorry."

Confused, Sesshomaru frowned. "For what?" When he didn't get an answer, he followed the pup's gaze.

The younger male was staring at his stomach, which was covered in slick seed. His little brother glanced up at him, looking guilty, as if he'd committed a crime by dirtying the demon's body with his release.

Sesshomaru smirked; just as he was learning about Inuyasha, so should the hanyou-turned-human learn about him.

He lowered one hand to trail his claws through his dark angel's essence, then lifted the fingers to his own mouth and slowly licked them, holding those dark eyes with his own as he murmured. "Inuyasha, believe me when I say I really do not give a damn."  
He didn't; he was proud to have relieved the younger male, and Inuyasha tasted _gooood_. He found himself wondering if his little brother tasted different as a hanyou. He looked and smelled different, so...

Inuyasha stared at him for a long moment, looking conflicted, as if he wasn't sure whether or not he should be embarrassed. Then the human smiled and shrugged, and went to sit up straight on the demon's lap.

Sesshomaru moaned as the movement provided delicious friction to his own aching body. Inuyasha paused, then, slowly and deliberately, rocked against him.

Sesshomaru only thought about that for a moment before hissing at his provocative little brother. "No. We are not going to mate."

The younger male froze, and Sesshomaru saw the violet eyes widen before they slid away from his. He felt a sharp pain in his chest as he realized his savage denial had hurt his little one. He took a deep breath and spoke as softly as he could while his body burned with need.

"Inuyasha, we can't. You have never been taken, have you?"

The younger male shook his head and started fidgeting self-conciously. Sesshomaru continued speaking quietly. " The first time hurts, little one. Preparation helps, but I...I would still hurt you. I will not do that, because I believe that would very effectively break my promise."

He took another deep breath, then whispered. "Even if I had not promised not to hurt you, I...I do not wish to cause you any more pain than I already have, Inuyasha."

Sesshomaru watched as Inuyasha nodded, still not meeting his eyes as a confused, heartbroken look crossed the pup's face. This concerned Sesshomaru because he did not like that look on his little brother's face, and he had a feeling it was there because of him.

"Inuyasha? I'm sorry, little one." He never apologized, but gods, he didn't want Inuyasha to look like someone had just crushed his heart!

Inuyasha shook his head. 'Don't apologize. You are keeping your promise. I'm just..not sure how I feel about it."

Sesshomaru tilted his head, confused. "What do you mean?"

The younger male sighed. "I know that you don't want to hurt me, and you have _no_ idea what that means to me. But, I...I've wanted to be with you for...um..for quite a while now. I never imagined it'd be on my human night, since I seriously didn't want you to know what night it is. Anyways, I got ahead of myself and thought...tonight...I might actually have a chance to be with you."

Sesshomaru frowned at the devastated tone in the human's voice. "I appreciate the explanation, but it sounded like your nervous-honest rambling."

Inuyasha nodded. "Oh yeah. Now I'm nervous and extremely self-concious. That makes the rambling worse. If you don't talk, I guarantee I'll keep going. Did I mention I hate being human? They can't shut up."

Sesshomaru shrugged and said softly. "It's ok. I do not mind you talking, as long as you're honest." He took a deep breath and continued. "And as long as we are being honest with each other, you should know...I already knew your human night was on the new moon."

xxxxxxxxxx

Inuyasha froze, barely breathing. Sesshomaru had already known? He raised his eyes to meet his brother's, whispering. "What? How?"

The regal demon leaned his head against the cave wall as he spoke quietly. "You were born during a lunar eclipse. Easy enough to remember, considering that was the last time I saw Father. A half-demon born during a lunar eclipse will have their human night when the moon is dark."

Inuyasha felt himself shaking as he absorbed everything the youkai had said. "All this time, I've been hiding my human night from you for no reason?"

Sesshomaru gave him a small smile. "Yes, but you did very well. If I had not known when you were born, I would not have known your human night until now."

Inuyasha stared at his big brother as his focus shifted. "You...you said that was the last time you saw Father?"

Slowly, the older male nodded. "That was the night he died."

Inuyasha sucked in a breath. "Myoga said he died from the wounds he got while fighting Ryukotsusei!"  
Something felt wrong here; his mother had told him only a little about his father because every time she spoke of him, she'd started crying. Inuyasha had eventually stopped asking, trying to spare her that grief.

He became alarmed when Sesshomaru met his eyes squarely and said. "First of all, I am proud of you for killing that nasty worm when Father could not, ok?"

Inuyasha nodded, feeling dread settle in his stomach like a lead weight as he whispered. "How did Father die?"

That feeling of dread got worse when he sensed the demon hesitate before speaking. "He would have died anyway from the wounds that dragon gave him, but he knew Izayoi was in labor with you in a dangerous place. Wounds and all, he came to save her and you. He died fighting Takemaru so Izayoi could get away with you."

Inuyasha could not breathe.

Father had died because of him, and he'd had no idea.

He managed to crawl off of Sesshomaru's lap, not even concious of the decision to move.

He found himself sitting by the fire, hugging his knees to his chest as he whispered. "He died because of me and my mother. No wonder you hate me so much." He tucked his face against his knees, trying to breathe as tears welled up in his eyes and began to fall.

He didn't realize Sesshomaru had followed him until the youkai's arms were around him. He flinched and tried to pull away, but his brother didn't let go. Soft lips touched his temple as Sesshomaru spoke gently. "Please don't cry. I don't blame you or your mother. Father made the decision to come because he loved you both so much. He loved her, and he loved you the moment he found out she was pregnant. I didn't understand his feelings back then."

These words went right over Inuyasha's head as his mind connected a couple of things and came to a devastating conclusion.

Father's death was not the only thing he was responsible for.

"Oh gods! It..it's _all_ my fault!"

x 

_End of ch 7-'Whimper For Me_

What do you think Yasha's blaming himself for?

Notice to all my readers: I will be job-hunting and maybe posting another fic, so I will be busy. But rest assured, I would never abandon a story! I will be updating once a week, at the **very** least :)

next time...Chapter 8: Realizations

In which we have a self-loathing Inuyasha, an anxious Sesshomaru, perhaps a naughty Yasha when his human mind is distracted...


	8. Realizations

Discaimers-I do not own 'Inuyasha' or the characters. I think I might own the cave they're in.

 **"New Moon Fears"**

Sorry it's dragging ass, people.  
This fic does get better, citrusy goodness and lemons and secrets and drama and humor and more lemons and possibly a third joining them...  
As far as updating, I am trying to get a job (can I get paid for writing yaoi?) and I am also posting another fic at the same time. I still would never abandon a fic, so if you'll just be good patient little girls (and boys?) All good things come to those who wait!

Warnings: More freakin angst, comfort, they come to a realization about Sess, and perhaps a naughty Inuyasha if my readers behave themselves...

 **Chapter 8: Realizations**

 _*"Oh, gods! It...it's all my fault!"*_

As Inuyasha said this, he saw Sesshomaru watching him with suspicion and a little concern. The youkai frowned at him. "Something just occurred to that twisted little mind of yours, didn't it?"

Inuyasha nodded and whispered. "If he hadn't come to save us, he wouldn't have died. If he hadn't died, you wouldn't have challenged that demon. Sesshomaru, if it wasn't for me, you...you wouldn't have gotten hurt."

If he hadn't been consumed by guilt, Inuyasha would have been amused when Sesshomaru's jaw dropped open in shock. "That...oh gods, Inuyasha. Don't blame yourself for that. I told you - Father would have died from his wounds anyways."

Inuyasha's morbid self-loathing thoughts continued. "Then he might have been with you instead of with a human and a _half-breed_."  
He didn't realize he had said 'half-breed' with just as much hate as he'd ever heard when the slur of his blood was said to him.

Inuyasha tensed when Sesshomaru grabbed his arm and raised his voice. "Inuyasha, do not do this to yourself! None of that was your fault! Don't blame yourself for what happened to Father or to me!"

Inuyasha tried not to wince as the demon's hand tightened painfully on his arm, the youkai's grip digging into his human flesh. Unable to help himself as pain shot through the captured limb, he whimpered. "Sesshomaru, please. You..you're hurting me."

Immediately, the older male released his arm, staring at him and breathing, "I am sorry. I...I didn't mean to hurt you, Inuyasha. Are you alright?"

Inuyasha nodded; the pain had receded once the fierce grip had been removed. In spite of his nod, his brother scooted close and began anxiously examining his arm for injury. He said softly. "I'm alright, aniki. You were just holding it too hard. I'm ok, really."

Sesshomaru began gently stroking the spot he'd held, not meeting his eyes as he whispered. "I didn't mean to."

Inuyasha tilted his head as he realized the demon thought he had broken his promise. "Sesshomaru, I know you didn't mean to. It was an accident; you didn't break your promise, and I'm not mad at you or anything."

He became worried when the youkai didn't react to his words, and he asked quietly. "Are..are you ok, Sesshomaru?"

His big brother shook his head, still not meeting his eyes. "I do not know. I just did not want you to hurt yourself by taking blame for something that was not your fault. Then...then I hurt you, and I feel sick about it. I think something is wrong with me."

Inuyasha was quiet for a few moments, thinking about how the usually composed demon was starting to act very anxious...about him. He said softly, "I think I might have an idea of what's wrong."

The golden eyes met his, and he whispered. "This is just an idea; I'm probably wrong. But the way you've been acting and the things you've been saying...Sesshomaru, it kinda seems like you might...like me, and aren't sure how to deal with it."

He held his breath as the Lord of the West stared at him with wide eyes. After a long, silent moment that felt like forever, he let out his breath and turned his eyes back to the fire, muttering. "Never mind. That was stupid; you don't like anybody. You probably just have some canine-demon version of rabies and that's all that's wrong with-"

He was cut off by Sesshomaru's lips pressing against his own. He moaned helplessly as the demon kissed him passionately and a little roughly. He was pulled tightly against the older male, finding himself caged within his brother's arms. He moaned again and lifted his arms around broad shoulders as he kissed back.

Inuyasha found himself panting for air when the warm, sweet mouth left his. Sesshomaru was breathing hard as well as they leaned their foreheads together.

Inuyasha spoke tentatively. "Se..Sesshomaru?"

Fiery amber eyes met his own. "You are very clever, little brother. I..I think you may be right. Tell me, how did you come by that idea of yours?"

Inuyasha blushed as he answered softly. "A few different things. If...if you didn't like me, you wouldn't be so worried about hurting me. And you've been nice to me. Really nice, actually. You say you don't want me to be afraid of you and you want me to feel safe with you. You...you've also been saying really nice things...like endearments. I..I like 'dark angel' the best, but I'm also a big fan of 'precious little one'. Why would you say things like that if you didn't like me? I...I'm sorry I'm rambling again."

He blushed harder and started to lean away, stopping when a clawed hand gently wrapped around the back of his neck and Sesshomaru touched the tips of their noses together.

The demon whispered, "I know you have trouble with canine sounds tonight, but what about canine gestures?"

Inuyasha nodded. "I can usually still understand them, but I might not react to them like usual. This is an affectionate one, I think. Right?"

Sesshomaru smiled at him and nodded, rubbing their noses together tenderly as he murmured. "Actually, it is a very affectionate gesture that also shows trust in each other."  
Then the demon pulled away a little. "I really do not mind you talking, so you should stop apologizing for your rambling. It..it's just making up for all the talking we have not done in the past."

Inuyasha, feeling safe caged by his big brother's arms, spoke softly. "Then I have a question for you...if that's alright."

Sesshomaru tilted his head. "It is alright, little one. What is it?"

Inuyasha took a shaky breath and lowered his eyes. "Um, ok. I really, really hope I'm not wrong about this, but tonight, when you saved me from that reptile...that...that's not the first time you've protected me, is it?"

He heard the whispered reply. "No, little brother. It is not the first time I've tried to keep you safe."

Inuyasha slowly lifted his eyes to the proud youkai's. "You pushed me out of the way when we were fighting Sounga, didn't you? You took that blast by yourself. My...my heart hurt when I saw you driven to your knees and smelled your blood. But...oh, _gods_ , I was so glad you were alive, aniki!"

He closed his eyes as he felt tears forming at the memory. A heartbeat later, clawed fingers grazed his cheek and warm breath ghosted over his ear. "Please don't cry, my dark angel. I do not regret pushing you out of the way because the Dragon Twister did not hurt as much as losing you would have."

Inuyasha opened his eyes, having to blink because Sesshomaru was blurry. He fought his ridiculous human tears as he smiled shakily. "See? You say things like that, makes me think you like me at least a little."

He heard a soft growl as his brother's arms tightened around him. "I think I like you more than a _little_ , otouto."

Before Inuyasha could respond, the demon tilted his head to kiss him with a possessiveness that had not been there before. He kissed back with all the passion that he'd felt for the last several years towards the older male, sliding his hands up into his brother's silky hair and giving a desperate moan as he pressed his body closer.

A deep growl vibrated the youkai's body when Inuyasha's thigh brushed against the hardness hidden by silk hakamas. He smiled to himself; Sesshomaru had been so considerate as to relieve _his_ pain earlier, so it was only fair he bring the demon lord his own relief.

And it was something he knew he was good at, especially when he didn't have fangs...

He lowered one hand to caress the impressive bulge through the silk, feeling his brother's body tense.

Inuyasha met the narrowed amber eyes and said softly, "I know, I know. No mating, you don't wanna hurt me. I've got something else in mind for you, big brother."

.

.

 _End of Ch 8-Realizations_

Hmmm, what could Inuyasha be planning? Bet you already know ;) Sorry it's a bit short, I got shit going on, all at once.

 _Please read~x~_  
My mother-in-law has been diagnosed with cancer (for the 4th time) so I am dealing with that, and 500 less-significant things, including a brown recluse bite, a possessed computer, family drama, and assorted other bullshit.

Please be patient with me, I still would never abandon a fic or my wonderful readers. I will be updating whenever I get the chance, I promise.

 **Next time...Chapter 9: Skills and Sounds**

In which we will see a _very_ naughty Inuyasha, and Sesshomaru discovers that something strange happens to him after an intense orgasm...let your mind play with  that line :) 


	9. Skills and Sounds

Disclaimer-Let me check real quick…nope, I still do not own any rights, nor am I profiting in any way.

~New Moon Fears~

Thank you for all the support, my darlings. It's a rough time in the house of SesshomaruFreak, but it does help to know that I have so many good thoughts from people who don't even know me besides through my writing. *big hugs*

 _Warnings: A very naughty Inuyasha (finally!) and Sesshomaru realizes something odd happens to him after an intense release.  
Language._

 **Chapter 9: Skills and Sounds**

Previously, on 'NMF' - * _Inuyasha met the narrowed amber eyes and said softly, "I know, I know. No mating; you don't wanna hurt me. I've got something else in mind for you, big brother."*_

Sesshomaru found himself panting softly as Inuyasha stroked his aching body through the silk hakamas, and his dark angel smiled at him. "I may have never been taken, but I still have some skills, aniki. Lean back and let me help you."

Without hesitation, he obeyed, leaning back on his elbows as he wondered just what kind of 'skills' his little brother possessed. He didn't resist when Inuyasha pulled off his boots and tugged his white hakamas down, and he realized the younger male seemed more sure of himself than he had all night.

Sesshomaru hummed in approval. "A confident human Inuyasha. Do you know how sexy you look right now?"

Inuyasha grinned and pulled a leather tie out of the pocket of his fire-rat hakamas. He tied his hair up, then flicked the long black ponytail before replying to the demon's question. "Hmmm, nope. But you look pretty damn good yourself."

Sesshomaru watched with curiosity as Inuyasha kneeled between his knees and leaned closer to his body, dark eyes focused on his throbbing member. He asked. "What are you doing? Not that you don't look incredible between my legs, because you do."

Inuyasha sent a wicked smile his way. "Don't worry, I promise you'll like this." Then the human lowered his head to lick his aching length.

Sesshomaru gasped and his body twitched of it's own accord. Inuyasha raised those deep, dark eyes to his, then slowly and deliberately trailed his tongue from the base to the tip.

He shivered and shifted his hips as his body began to burn in a most delicious way. "Ohhh, I like that. Please do that again." he breathed, heart pounding so hard, he was sure Inuyasha could hear it even with his human ears.

He watched, body humming, as Inuyasha wrapped one hand around the base of his cock and dragged that wicked tongue along the veins and around the head.

Sesshomaru moaned in pleasure as he twitched his hips under the torturous attention. "Ahh, damn, otouto. That...ah, that feels amazing!"

Inuyasha raised his head and grinned at him. "Oh, that's nothing, big brother."

Sesshomaru saw the mischievous look in his dark angel's violet eyes just before his aching length was engulfed in wet heat. As his cock disappeared between the soft lips, he moaned at the feeling, sucking in a breath and holding it when Inuyasha's tight, warm throat began flexing around him.

He didn't realize he was still holding his breath until Inuyasha lifted his head and spoke sternly. "You need to breathe, cause if you pass out, I just might do dirty things with your body. I could replace my mouth with something even tighter. You'll wake up and I won't be a virgin anymore, just because you forgot to breathe. Consider yourself warned."

Sesshomaru resumed breathing and raised his eyebrows at the younger male's audacity. Before he could reply, however, Inuyasha lowered his head and refocused on his throbbing body. He moaned and tilted his hips towards his little brother. "Ahhh, Inu- _yasha_. That...that's...ahhohh."

He managed to stay up on his elbows, digging his claws into the stone at his sides as he watched the beautiful human take his entire member into that heavenly mouth and throat. Mmmm, Inuyasha had not been bluffing when he said he had skills!  
Sesshomaru knew he was not small by any means, and he had never been pleasured in such a way, but this felt so damn good, and Inuyasha almost looked like he was enjoying himself. Or at least enjoying his responses.

He growled softly, body trembling as Inuyasha began stroking the base of his member with one hand, which sent fire rushing through his blood. He felt his brother's other hand drift lower, caressing him gently.

Sesshomaru's body tensed as the wandering hand crept closer to his vulnerable entrance, and he found himself hissing at the human servicing his body. Inuyasha raised his head and whispered. "I know what I'm doing, and I don't have any claws. I'm not going to hurt you; I can make this feel even better for you. Do you trust me, big brother?"

Sesshomaru hesitated for a moment, watching those big, dark eyes that held desire and a little concern.

If he could ask the pup that he'd abused to trust him, he could certainly trust the pup who no longer showed fear of him.

He closed his eyes and gave a low whine as he nodded. He heard his dark angel's soft voice. "Don't worry, aniki. I'll take good care of you."

Sesshomaru tried to relax his body as he felt wet fingertips gently stroke his most vulnerable area, shivering when the tender touch began to feel good. The firm strokes and enthusiastic sucking on his member continued while one damp finger pressed more firmly against the ring of muscle. He gave a soft growl and tilted his hips, agreeing to his little brother's plan. He kept his eyes closed, feeling self-conscious but more aroused than he'd ever been in his long life.

Sesshomaru panted softly as the clawless finger gently slid into his body and began caressing him. He realized the intrusive digit didn't feel bad as it massaged him from the inside, then it brushed against something that sent tingles all the way to the tips of his claws.  
He gasped at the delightful sensation, and Inuyasha began sucking him harder than before as a second finger slipped in beside the first. Sesshomaru moaned loudly, shifting his body into the rhythm of his brother's attention.

The fingers curled to brush that spot again, and he whimpered as he opened his eyes to watch Inuyasha. From his vantage point, it looked like his dark angel was worshiping his body, and the sight fueled the tingly fire that was making him feel as if he were going to burst into flames at any moment.

Sesshomaru began to growl in pleasure, starting to rock his hips as the pressure grew. He growled louder and louder when he felt his release blaze through his body, then his control snapped.

The demon lord snarled savagely and his whole body arched as his seed shot down his little brother's throat, the rush finally relieving that aching pressure.

Sesshomaru panted breathlessly, realizing that his throat seemed to be making noises without his consent. Without meaning to, he was alternating between fierce growls and soft whimpers.

 _How odd._

His head dropped back, and he felt a clawless hand touch his. Instinctively, he turned his hand palm-up to wrap it gently around Inuyasha's, careful of his claws. He didn't try to lift his head until he felt his little brother relinquish his body.

Sesshomaru intended to thank the human for that impressive show of skill. However, all that came out was a savage growl.

Surprised, his head snapped up and he saw that Inuyasha was staring at him. "Are you ok, Sesshomaru?"

He tried to answer, but only produced a wicked hissing noise. He saw alarm flash across his brother's features as the younger male tensed. A nervous scent began to drift off of his little one, and his heart clenched.

 _As a human, Inuyasha couldn't understand..._

Sesshomaru shook his head and tugged gently on the hand he held, a soft whimper coming from him as he attempted to reassure his dark angel that the ferocious growls and hissing had not meant he was mad. He tugged on the hand again, and Inuyasha nodded, whispering, "Ok, ok, I'm coming."

Not pulling his hand away, his little brother crawled up beside him, still smelling nervous as the dark eyes watched him warily. Sesshomaru struggled to speak, desperate to reassure the human before he could become afraid.

His traitorous body only produced a soft keening noise, but Inuyasha tilted his head at this sound. "You...you're not mad, you just can't talk, right?"

Incredibly relieved that the younger male knew he was not angry, Sesshomaru nodded urgently with a slight whine. Inuyasha scooted closer to his side, still holding his hand. "It's ok, Sesshomaru. Um, has this ever happened before?"

Sesshomaru shook his head with a confused little huff, and Inuyasha's dark eyes widened. "Oh. Well, ok. I'm not really sure if this means I did good or not. And this is really weird, since I can't understand you. For all I know, you could be talking shit about me."

He shook his head frantically, whimpering as he lifted one hand to run his fingers through Inuyasha's fluffy black bangs. His little brother smiled and leaned into his hand, murmuring, "Ok, you're not saying bad stuff about me."

Sesshomaru leaned closer and began tenderly licking Inuyasha's forehead, hoping his transformed brother would understand the canine gesture. He gave a curious whimper as he nudged the thick black bangs out of the way to continue kissing and licking along the pup's hairline from temple to temple.

He sensed Inuyasha's body relax against him. "Ok, I think I know this one. Umm, reassurance...and you'll keep me safe. Something like that, right?"

He nodded, rumbling deep in his chest as he continued kissing the younger male's forehead. Inuyasha shifted closer and said softly. "You'd better mean it, then. By the way, did you know that it sounds like you're..um..purring?"

Sesshomaru shrugged and continued the deep rumbles as he leaned away a bit to meet those deep violet eyes. He wanted to tell his insecure little one how beautiful, and amazing, and _special_ he was, but all that came out was a soft growl, and he whined in disappointment.

Inuyasha's hand tightened on his as he asked softly. "Are...are you trying to say something nice to me?"

He nodded and gave another low whine.

Inuyasha tilted his head. "A compliment?"

Relieved that his little brother was at least trying, and partially succeeding, to understand him, Sesshomaru kissed Inuyasha on his nose and smiled at him.

The younger male blushed and whispered. "Well, I might not know what it is, but thank you for the compliment."

Sesshomaru leaned close to nuzzle his dark angel, and after a few moments, he felt a strange tingle in his chest and throat. Wondering if this meant he was regaining the power of speech, he tried to talk. "M..my Inu-yasha."

Dark, surprised eyes lifted to his, and Sesshomaru's heart hurt when he saw the mixed hope and doubt in the violet gaze. His dark angel asked softly, "What did you say?"

Sesshomaru cleared his throat and spoke hoarsely. "My Inuyasha."  
He laid a clawed hand on the human's chest and whispered, "Mine."  
He moved the hand to his own chest. "Yours." he breathed.

He remembered that the humanized pup could not sense deceit, and so did not know if he could trust the demon's words, but he saw the hope in the dark eyes before they lowered to the ground.

Inuyasha took a shaky breath and spoke quietly. "Please...please don't say that unless you really mean it. I don't think I could handle a lie like that."

Willing to accept the doubt of his dark angel, and just glad Inuyasha was giving him a chance, Sesshomaru inhaled the scent of his little brother.

When demons or hanyous had found their true mate, someone that they loved, it was in their scent.

Inuyasha had the scent, even in his human form.

Now Sesshomaru wanted to hear it. He knew Inuyasha had _almost_ said it earlier, but suddenly, hearing his little brother say those three words was all the demon lord wanted out of life right now.

He knew that because the younger male was human and felt vulnerable, he'd have to coax it out.

He took a deep breath and touched his claws to Inuyasha's chin, making him meet his eyes.

"Little brother, earlier when you said you liked me, you were going to say something else. What was it?"

.

 _End of Ch9: Skills and Sounds_

.

Alrighty then! Don't be too hard on Yasha for not trusting Sess completely, he is unable to tell if someone is lying when he's human. Not to mention, does one night really make up for years of cruelty?

Thanks again for all the support; you guys are awesome! Things are still rough, but we're making it, and I am still trying to update as regularly as possible.

 _Next time - Ch 10: Convincing_

In which Sesshomaru coaxes a confession out of his little brother, and we see _just_ how persuasive Inuyasha can be when he wants something...


	10. Convincing

Disclaimer - Still do not own rights or characters, (if I owned Sesshomaru, do you really think I'd be on here?)

~New Moon Fears~

Still rough, still doing what I can :) Thank you to everyone that has had my back *hugs*

Warnings: Language, of course. A confession that I probably wrote _way_ too mushy , a very persuasive Inuyasha, once he's done being mushy!  


 **Chapter 10: Convincing**

Previously.. _*"Little brother, earlier when you said you liked me, you were going to say something else. What was it?"*_

Inuyasha tensed as he realized what the powerful demon was asking about. Earlier, he had almost admitted, _out loud_ , that he loved this majestic youkai. He felt his body shaking as he stared up into amber eyes that he'd never seen warmth in before tonight.

He didn't want to say it, it hurt so much to love someone that could never love him back. He whimpered softly. "Please...don't."

The older male leaned close and feathered a tender kiss over his forehead. He shivered at the safe, reassuring gesture, only vaguely aware of how odd it was that a canine gesture was working on his _human_ form. As his body began to relax, he heard his brother murmur, "Tell me what you were going to say, my dark angel. I promise I will not be angry."

Those golden eyes met his, and the demon gave him a tiny smile. "If you are nervous, you are more than welcome to ramble, my emotional little otouto, as long as you are honest with me."

Inuyasha took a shaky breath, lowered his eyes, and dove into uncharted waters.

He spoke as quickly as he could, knowing that if he didn't get it all out now, he may never have another chance.

"I love you, Sesshomaru. I can't even remember when it started. No matter how cruel you were, I always thought you were magnificent. I love you so much, you mean bastard, and oh gods, it _kills_ me when you act like I'm not shit, like I d-don't matter! My heart breaks every time I see you, cause I know you're just gonna be a cold, hateful asshole, no matter how much I wish otherwise.  
That's why I hoped I was right about tonight not being the first time you've helped me. Yeah, I'm scared of you because you can, and have, hurt me physically, but I was more scared you'd find out your half-breed half-brother loves you like...like...like Myoga loves blood.  
I knew if you found out, you'd kill me for sure. I think you might be an asshole just for making me tell you this, cause being _emotionally_ vulnerable is so much worse than being _physically_ vulnerable, not that the Ice Prince would know a damn thing about either of those."

Inuyasha was breathing hard as he let go of the clawed hand he'd forgotten he was holding. He lifted both hands to his own chest to cover his aching heart as he bowed his head and closed his eyes.

He whispered to the demon that he could feel watching him. "I love you so much, and I didn't want you to know because even if you didn't kill me, you'd r-r-reject me just like you've rejected me as a brother and as a half-breed, and you have _no idea_ how much that hurts. Rejecting me because I wasn't born perfect is bad enough, but if you were to reject the fact that I love you, I'd die of a broken heart. You're such a jerk."

Inuyasha could feel his eyes burning as tears tried to gather, and he whimpered in despair. Damn weak human emotions! He could never handle them in this form, since he wasn't human often enough to actually get used to them.

A soft voice surrounded him. "Shhh, it's ok, otouto." He felt Sesshomaru repeat the canine gesture of reassurance, licking along his hairline gently. "Please look at me, little one."

Inuyasha realized he was trembling as he raised his eyes to meet the demon's. The honey eyes held his as Sesshomaru leaned close enough to lick his tears away, murmuring, "I am so sorry I've hurt you, and not just physically. I have been unforgivably cruel to you, and it is incredible that you've loved me after everything I've done."

Inuyasha watched the warm amber eyes as he breathed. "Oh, gods, you have no idea how much I liked hearing that, but...but...oh, aniki, you know I can't tell if you're lying."

Sesshomaru nodded slowly. "Human senses, I know. As a hanyou, you'd be able to tell by my scent and voice if I was being deceitful. Inuyasha, would you rather wait until sunrise to hear what I have to say?"

Inuyasha's heart pounded and he took a shaky breath, filled with shame and guilt as he nodded. "Yes..please. I'm sorry..I can't trust you, no matter how desperately I want to."

As he lowered his eyes in shame, he felt a clawed hand begin gently stroking his hair and heard the youkai's voice. "It is ok, my dark angel. Do not apologize; it is my own fault that you have trouble trusting me. Just...stay with me. Don't...don't leave, ok?"

Inuyasha felt soft lips press against his temple, and he whispered, "Ok." as Sesshomaru began nuzzling his hair. It was a canine action that he recognized; the demon was showing affection and that he wished for them to stay close to each other.

Even as a human, he was comforted by this affection that he instinctively believed was sincere. He moved one hand from his own chest and tentatively laid it on his brother's, feeling the heartbeat he couldn't hear in this form. "I...I've always been able to hear your heart, but I can't now." he whispered.

Before the youkai could reply, Inuyasha impulsively shifted closer and turned his head to press his human ear against Sesshomaru's broad chest, sighing contentedly when he heard the strong, steady beat of his big brother's heart.

He felt slender arms wrap gently around him as he listened to the demon's heartbeat. Instinctively, he shifted to snuggle against the older male, hearing the heartbeat speed up as he pressed his body close.

Inuyasha smiled to himself when he felt Sesshomaru's body responding to his movements, and the heart under his ear began to pound. He tilted his head to look up at his brother, who seemed to be panting through clenched fangs.

He asked softly, "Sesshomaru?" When the burning amber eyes shifted to his, he continued, "You know I still want to mate, right?" As he spoke, he pressed his own aching body against the powerful youkai's invitingly, feeling the heat and hardness of an aroused demon.

A soft growl warned him he was playing with fire as honey eyes watched him with suspicion. "I..I will not break my promise, Inuyasha, so stop."

Even as the canine demon spoke, Inuyasha heard claws digging into the stone right behind his back, where Sesshomaru's hands were, and he caught the way the golden eyes flicked over him for just an instant.

Carefully, he pressed closer, watching the amber eyes as he said softly. "We can mate and your promise can stay intact."

Golden-bronze eyes narrowed at him suspiciously. "How?"

Inuyasha took a deep breath, hoping he could say this right so the honor-bound demon would agree. "Retract your promise. You've kept your word until now; you haven't hurt me. Take your promise back, and it no longer binds you, but you kept it while it lasted. Your vow will stay intact, big brother."

He watched as the older male's amber eyes narrowed even further and a soft hiss of barely repressed excitement filled the air. "Oh, you are a devious little one, are you not? I _do_ want you, little brother. Very, very badly. I want to make you _**mine**_ **.** I desire you a thousand times more than I _ever_ wanted Tetsusaiga."

Inuyasha felt his eyes widen, knowing how badly the first-born son had coveted their father's Fang. Before he could respond, the demon was pressing their bodies even tighter together, sliding a hard thigh between his legs and urgently sniffing him.

He realized Sesshomaru was seeking any trace of fear in his scent, and he whispered, "I am not afraid of you, aniki."

The regal demon met his eyes and gave a frustrated-sounding growl. "Even without the promise, I do not want-"

Knowing what the youkai was about to say, Inuyasha leaned up and kissed him, then muttered, "Don't wanna hurt me, got it. But, stubborn-ass, I know it's gonna hurt, and I still want to do this. Just be careful or whatever, because dammit, Sesshomaru, I don't know what's gonna happen after tonight. For all I know, this might be my only chance to be with you. Don't take this chance from me, please!"

Inuyasha watched as a slow, wicked smile curved his brother's lips. "As my dark angel wishes. Consider my promise retracted. We will mate."

~x~x~x~

Sesshomaru watched as Inuyasha's dark eyes widened. "Really?" his brother asked, looking heart-wrenchingly hopeful. Sesshomaru nodded, feeling his chest tighten as he thought about hurting his dark angel once again.  
He said quietly. "We will mate, but I want to make you a new promise first, and get one from you."

The younger male tilted his head. "What's that?"

Sesshomaru took a deep breath. "I promise I'll be careful and do my best to make sure I don't hurt you worse than I have to."

Inuyasha smiled shyly at him and whispered. "I accept that promise, aniki."

Sesshomaru continued with the only thing he could think of besides how much he wanted to fuck the smaller male into mutual oblivion. "In return, I want you to promise that if...if I hurt you too badly, you'll let me know. And that you won't...hate me for hurting you again. I _need_ this promise, Inuyasha."

The human version of his brother nodded, leaning up to kiss his chin while the dark amethyst eyes stayed focused on his. "Yes, Sesshomaru. I promise I won't hate you, and that I'll let you know if I can't handle it."

Then Inuyasha licked under his chin, offering his submission in the most canine way. Sesshomaru moaned at the submissive gesture, tilting his head back when the younger male began kissing and licking his throat with an enthusiasm that surprised the demon lord just as much as it pleased him.

As he tilted his head to receive his intended mate's attention, he saw that the fire was burning low.  
It would go out soon, and Inuyasha would be blinded by the darkness.

He pulled away a little, and violet eyes shot to his, looking shocked and confused. He kissed his little brother on the nose and murmured, "It's ok. You can have my neck in a minute, my eager little one. I need to do something first." He stood and strode over to the other side of the small cave, gathering some sticks left behind after making the fire. He brought them back and built the small fire up until it burned brightly.

Sesshomaru had felt Inuyasha's eyes following him the whole time, and when he glanced up, those deep, dark eyes were filled with understanding and gratitude, a sweet smile curving those soft lips. He smiled back, then a thought occurred to him. He glanced around and began gathering their discarded clothes, hearing Inuyasha ask, "Whatcha doing now, aniki?"

Sesshomaru smirked at the curious human. "You'll see. It's something for you. Hmmm, actually, may I have your hakamas?"

Inuyasha's eyebrows rose, and the humanized pup had the grace and decency to blush the deepest shade of red Sesshomaru had ever seen. The younger male did not hesitate, though, saying only, "Sure thing." before slipping out of the fire-rat garment and handing them over.

Sesshomaru couldn't help it; his sharp eyes swept over his little brother's completely exposed form. Gods, since when did anybody look that fucking _delicious?!_ He found himself giving a soft growl of desire and was relieved when the human didn't even blink.

Inuyasha merely tilted his head and said shyly. "I'm thinking that was a good growl, big brother. Am I right?"

He nodded, then said softly. "Very good. Now stop distracting me for a moment, this is important. Please?"

The younger male nodded, watching as Sesshomaru began arranging their clothes on the stone floor near the fire. First, he laid down Inuyasha's thick fire-rat clothes and white undershirt. He covered them with his own silky clothes, then laid his fluff across one end and down the side opposite the fire.

Sesshomaru patted the improvised bed meticulously until he was sure the rough, hard stone floor couldn't be felt. He glanced up to see Inuyasha watching him, and suddenly felt self-conscious. "The cave floor is rough and human skin is more delicate and I did not want it to hurt you."

It occurred to him that he had never done something like this in any of his past ruts; making sure their partner would be comfortable was something canine demons only instinctively did for their true mates.

He watched as Inuyasha came to his side and kissed him on the cheek, murmuring, "Thank you. It's very nice, aniki."

Sesshomaru slid one arm around the younger male's waist and touched their noses together, deciding Inuyasha should know why he'd done this. "Just so you know, otouto, I have rutted before, but I've never done _this_." he gestured at the pallet he'd made and continued, "This is something a canine would only do for their mate. Do you understand?"

Inuyasha blushed and asked in a small voice. "The difference between rutting and mating...um, isn't that like the difference between having sex and making love is for humans?"

Sesshomaru sensed that his little brother, who had grown up without a proper demonic education, was mortified that he'd had to ask that question. He nodded, saying softly. "Exactly right. It only counts as mating if two people really care for each other. I know you care about me, and even though you may not believe me right now, I care for you, little brother."

He watched as Inuyasha's dark eyes widened, searching his own as if trying to make sure he was telling the truth. Knowing the human could not sense deceit, he spoke gently. "My apologies, my dark angel. Do you want me to change the subject?"

The younger male gave a tiny nod, whispering, "Please?"

Sesshomaru found himself smiling once again. _'When was the last time I smiled? Inuyasha...he makes me want to smile.'_

He tilted his head, inviting Inuyasha to lay down on the bed he'd made. The pup didn't hesitate, moving to lay down on his back, stretched out on one side of the pallet. "It's perfect, Sesshomaru. You did a very good job on it."

Sesshomaru realized he was staring. Even as a human, Inuyasha's muscles were lean and defined. The lightly tanned skin bore only a few scars, thanks to his usual healing abilities. Against the white silk, his dark angel was a glorious sight.

Sesshomaru took a shaky breath, suddenly conflicted as he thought about claiming the only person he'd thought of in years, but knowing this would hurt his little one at first.

"Sesshomaru?" His eyes flew up to meet dark violet, and his brother asked softly, "Are you thinking about hurting me?"

When he nodded, Inuyasha smiled at him. "Why don't you come over here by me?" the transformed hanyou asked, patting the silky space next to him.

As Sesshomaru moved to lay by his intended mate, Inuyasha murmured. "If I didn't know better, I'd think you were nervous."

Sesshomaru didn't answer as he met the dark eyes. He saw them widen as Inuyasha breathed, "Ohhh. Well, that's ok. I'm a little nervous, too. But other than hurting me, you...you want to do this, too...um, don't you?"

The demon lord felt his chest tighten as he realized his hesitation was causing his beautiful brother to doubt that he was truly desired.

Sesshomaru said softly. "I do want to do this with you. More than I've ever wanted anything."

.

. 

_End of ch10: Convincing_

 _._

 _._

Yes, I know I'm a tease. You'll live :)  
I will warn anyone who did not notice in 'The Right Choice', my preparation scenes are long, simply because I hate when a submissive is not prepared and they hurt the whole time.  
This fic is no different, so be ready for that in the next chapter.

Also, I was medicated when I wrote the next chapter in my notebook :)

Next time..Ch 11: Starting the Rest of the Night

Sess preparing his submissive, a sassy Yasha, and we're getting the uncomfy and painful parts over with.


	11. Update 6-7-17

ATTENTION TO All READERS & FRIENDS!

First of all, I can't apologize enough for my extended absence. As of right now, typing this on WordPad, it is 2:34am Wed May 3, 2017. It has been approximately 5 to 5 1/2, maybe 6 months since I've been online.

To anyone that is 'following' or 'favoriting' me and my fics, I apologize that this is not actually an update. I promise that as soon as it's possible, I WILL be posting again.

So many things have gone wrong in the world of SesshomaruFreak. Since November of 2016, I have gotten divorced, moved from Arkansas to Michigan to live with my mom and little sister, and my health hasn't improved.

I now live in a 'village' where the gas station is the only store. I have no Internet access except Walmart's wifi in the next town. I do live closer to my family, but I no longer have any friends close by. My friends, my 'adopted' family, all live in Ar or are only online.

My world basically fell apart, and I still think of this site daily, regretting the fact that I haven't been able to get on here to update anything or tell y'all I'm still alive.

Fuck, I miss Internet! (yeah, I've still got a filthy mouth... pretty sure it's actually gotten worse) No Google, no email, no youtube or netflix, no fanfiction sites, no social media. I miss being able to watch anime and amvs, or look up music and dirty yaoi pics, I miss my fellow freaks, and omg I miss facebook! *considers throwing tantrum*

Oh and to add to my mental issues (depression and anxiety) I'm also trying to cope with the fact that I turn 30 this year, divorced and living with my mother. I have no insurance (so no doctor), no income of my own, no resources, hardly any real privacy, no outlet, no connections.

*deep breath* I'm sorry; this has come out as more of a rant than I originally intended. That's what happens when you have no way to really vent and shit builds up.

I don't even know when I'll be able to post this so that you know I didn't abandon you.  
I don't know when I'll have reliable Internet access again (as it is, I think I'm gonna have to drive 12 miles to walmart to MAYBE get this posted. Don't even know if it'll work.)

I miss all of you so much! FreakyPoet, BlackFox, IcyDoodles, Ayame99, Spunky, Nikki, my 'little brother', Ryuu No-Taisho, BloodyMadQueen, everyone that I exchanged messages with about anime, fics, yaoi, life, the meaning of the universe... I miss you so fucking much! If I didn't mention you by name, please forgive me; I've been through a lot, and the omission wasn't intentional.

I swear on my life that the moment I am able to, (ie: once I have Internet) I will be posting again. I will be messaging again, and I will be on facebook (Sarah Mingues (Snyder)) If you send a friend request, let me know who you are. I will be on other sites as Sarah Mingues, Sarah Snyder, or SesshomaruFreak. BTW Mingues is my married name, I just can't afford to have it changed back to Snyder cause Michigan charges $300.00 to do so.

Anyways, I will be online on a regular basis as soon as possible, though 'possible' may still be a ways off. So, if you message me, send a friend request, or email me (paininas yahoo . com) Hell, if you try to reach me through ANY online method, please don't take it personally if you don't get a response for a while. It's just because I haven't been able to do anything about it.

I will have to redo every single document in my document manager since they get deleted after 90 days. BUT for what it's worth, I do still have all my notebooks, my imagination, and my plot kittens!  
I still love Inuyasha and Sesshomaru as my main couple, but omg Renji and Byakuya (Bleach) own timeshares in my mind these days!  
Would love some messages/reviews on what my fellow freaks are looking forward to the most!  
That'll give me something to look forward to whenever I am able to get back on here.

All my love,  
~SesshomaruFreak

 _6-7-17 I have a library with wifi in the next town, but I do not know how often I'll be able to get here. Just don't give up on me :)_


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